Thanks for posting this and I'm glad you could express your feelings about it. So many of us feel this way, or have felt this way in the past. After all, abuse teaches us that there is no end to the depths to which we can be reduced. I remember that myself; no matter how bad things got there was always the possibility of something worse - and the abuser made sure I understood that.
But that was then and this is now. With time we relearn to trust our abilities to keep ourselves safe and to maintain a healthy life within the right boundaries. You're not alone in your struggle towards this goal, my friend. We do get back to a point where we see good things as a situation that will continue for us, as opposed to a momentary aberration that will soon cast us back into the abyss.
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me. (Woody Guthrie)