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#165823 - 07/10/07 10:01 AM This could have been written by me
pain4ever Offline


Registered: 04/05/01
Posts: 1032
Bawling at my desk..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=emRQrLJyqXU

Could have been written by me...its all I wanted as a kid...except I was a boy!

_________________________
Peace and Tranquility all depends on your frame of reference.

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#165873 - 07/10/07 03:32 PM Re: This could have been written by me [Re: pain4ever]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Brian,

Thanks for sharing this one. I wonder if there's anyone here who could read and listen to this without weeping with you. And the kid is so right: "I will learn to love me again."

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#165975 - 07/11/07 08:35 AM Re: This could have been written by me [Re: roadrunner]
pain4ever Offline


Registered: 04/05/01
Posts: 1032
Larry,

I love the opening..."I dont feel like being a strong rational adult anymore...I dont want to be logical and sensible" I feel like that everyday.

"I just want someone to love and take care of me....I want someone to protect and beleive in me....I want someone to save me"....its all I ever longed and pleaded for as a kid. I screamed in my prayers to God.

"I don't understand why you dont love me......what did i do so wrong?" I cried that over and over as a child, in my room at night as I trembled in fear, waiting for another surprise attack.

"I promise I will be good"........Thats all i said as tears streamed down my face....screamed it as my head exploded in pain.

"I don't deserve this..its not fair"............Dang too many night's as an adult I cried over that, I didnt realise it as a kid.


To me the biggest thing in that video.........."I'll promise anything...JUST LOVE ME".
It is Amazing.

_________________________
Peace and Tranquility all depends on your frame of reference.

Top
#165998 - 07/11/07 10:56 AM Re: This could have been written by me [Re: pain4ever]
shadowkid Offline
WARNING from ModTeam, September 2013: user "Shadowkid" was exposed as a hoaxer. His entire online persona and stories of sexual abuse were fiction. We encourage you not to become emotionally concerned by anything you see in any of his posts. Thank you
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/18/05
Posts: 2437
help me? please?



Edited by shadowkid (07/11/07 10:57 AM)
_________________________
its not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball - damien rice

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#166001 - 07/11/07 11:10 AM Re: This could have been written by me [Re: shadowkid]
shadowkid Offline
WARNING from ModTeam, September 2013: user "Shadowkid" was exposed as a hoaxer. His entire online persona and stories of sexual abuse were fiction. We encourage you not to become emotionally concerned by anything you see in any of his posts. Thank you
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/18/05
Posts: 2437
hit me ,hurt me , hate me ,i'll still love you.

_________________________
its not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball - damien rice

Top
#166002 - 07/11/07 11:14 AM Re: This could have been written by me [Re: shadowkid]
pain4ever Offline


Registered: 04/05/01
Posts: 1032
I know how you feel...its tough...so messed up that we were used like that.

_________________________
Peace and Tranquility all depends on your frame of reference.

Top
#166059 - 07/11/07 03:01 PM Re: This could have been written by me [Re: pain4ever]
Jaysen Offline
Member

Registered: 06/14/06
Posts: 680
This makes me sick to my stomach and so angry I could kill someone right now


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#166061 - 07/11/07 03:05 PM Re: This could have been written by me [Re: shadowkid]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Shadow,

Originally Posted By: shadowkid
hit me ,hurt me , hate me ,i'll still love you.


There just isn't anything so pure and innocent, or as entirely devoted and unquestioning, as the love of a child.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
#166152 - 07/11/07 09:38 PM Re: This could have been written by me [Re: roadrunner]
shadowkid Offline
WARNING from ModTeam, September 2013: user "Shadowkid" was exposed as a hoaxer. His entire online persona and stories of sexual abuse were fiction. We encourage you not to become emotionally concerned by anything you see in any of his posts. Thank you
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/18/05
Posts: 2437
they should show something like this on the today show ,on national tv ,during the fing super bowl !every ten minutes till the abuse stops forever.

_________________________
its not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball - damien rice

Top
#166155 - 07/11/07 09:42 PM Re: This could have been written by me [Re: shadowkid]
healingpartner Offline
Guest

Registered: 04/04/07
Posts: 407
I want to throw up


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#166217 - 07/12/07 08:43 AM Re: This could have been written by me [Re: Jaysen]
pain4ever Offline


Registered: 04/05/01
Posts: 1032
Originally Posted By: Jaysen
This makes me sick to my stomach and so angry I could kill someone right now


I am sorry guys I was not trying to upset you but honestly it is the best video I have ever seen...I can relate so well.

_________________________
Peace and Tranquility all depends on your frame of reference.

Top
#166218 - 07/12/07 08:44 AM Re: This could have been written by me [Re: shadowkid]
pain4ever Offline


Registered: 04/05/01
Posts: 1032
Originally Posted By: shadowkid
hit me ,hurt me , hate me ,i'll still love you.


All you were looking for is the affection that you should have been shown. Someone to love you and we were forced to think that our abuse was the Love we craved.

_________________________
Peace and Tranquility all depends on your frame of reference.

Top
#166249 - 07/12/07 10:35 AM Re: This could have been written by me [Re: pain4ever]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Brian,

Don't be sorry! It's a powerful and important statement and I think it's good for us to see it. Sometimes important things can affect us in a very emotional way.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
#166251 - 07/12/07 10:37 AM Re: This could have been written by me [Re: roadrunner]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Brian - another thought. If you are concerned about this, just go back to the original post, get into edit mode, and add "possible triggers" to the title. That should do it for any guy who might get emotionally overwhelmed.

L.

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
#166253 - 07/12/07 10:38 AM Re: This could have been written by me [Re: roadrunner]
pain4ever Offline


Registered: 04/05/01
Posts: 1032
Check out another of her videos...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zAWs04AN29s

Its a letter to her mom and Dad.

_________________________
Peace and Tranquility all depends on your frame of reference.

Top
#166327 - 07/12/07 03:21 PM Re: This could have been written by me [Re: pain4ever]
Logan Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/05/03
Posts: 1241
Loc: NY
hey Brian, thanx for post this, as painful as it is to watch, it has a powerful impact and a massage that must be delivered/and HEARD!!

Here's another video. This one is also sad, but the song lyrics give hope! May Trigger

Http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7xaBWUcbAyQ&NR=1



Edited by Logan (07/12/07 03:46 PM)
_________________________
"Terrible thing to live in Fear"-Shawshank Redemption
WOR Alumnus Hope Springs 2009
"Quite a thing to live in fear, this is what is means to be a slave"
-Blade Runner

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#166329 - 07/12/07 03:36 PM Re: This could have been written by me [Re: Logan]
Logan Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/05/03
Posts: 1241
Loc: NY
here's another one by the same guy

http://www.youtube/watch?v=ZX25smmKLtY May be more triggering



Edited by Logan (07/12/07 03:46 PM)
_________________________
"Terrible thing to live in Fear"-Shawshank Redemption
WOR Alumnus Hope Springs 2009
"Quite a thing to live in fear, this is what is means to be a slave"
-Blade Runner

Top
#166453 - 07/13/07 07:34 AM Re: This could have been written by me [Re: Logan]
shadowkid Offline
WARNING from ModTeam, September 2013: user "Shadowkid" was exposed as a hoaxer. His entire online persona and stories of sexual abuse were fiction. We encourage you not to become emotionally concerned by anything you see in any of his posts. Thank you
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/18/05
Posts: 2437
p4e thanks for posting this i agree its the best explanation i have seen of what abuse does to us ,can you believe i e mailed the author and her first response to me was ,i have no one to talk to about this stuff? thanks again its an amazing video. adam

_________________________
its not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball - damien rice

Top
#167743 - 07/19/07 03:20 PM Re: This could have been written by me [Re: shadowkid]
pain4ever Offline


Registered: 04/05/01
Posts: 1032
Its amazing the deafening silence around all of this...I hate it.

_________________________
Peace and Tranquility all depends on your frame of reference.

Top
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