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#16406 - 11/18/05 05:18 AM first timer scared crapless!
shadowkid Offline
WARNING from ModTeam, September 2013: user "Shadowkid" was exposed as a hoaxer. His entire online persona and stories of sexual abuse were fiction. We encourage you not to become emotionally concerned by anything you see in any of his posts. Thank you
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/18/05
Posts: 2437
i;m not too sure how this works ,but i'm shadow and i sure could use some help ,i think most of my problem right now is how much our courts let me down .i put him away ,now he is out and he is going to get me ,i just know it .if anyone asked me if they should prosecute someone my advice would be NO. i'm 21 now ,i was 13 when he went to jail .if anybody wants to talk please let me know shadow

_________________________
its not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball - damien rice

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#16407 - 11/18/05 05:24 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
OKIE MIKE Offline
Member

Registered: 02/13/04
Posts: 982
Loc: HULBERT OK
Have a PFA served on him . If the SOB even tryes to get any where near you He will be arested and sent back to prison

_________________________
MICHAEL

"I HAD NO SHOES THEN I SAW A MAN THAT HAD NO FEET"

"All I can do is be me, whoever that is"

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#16408 - 11/18/05 05:28 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
fozzy_bear Offline
Member

Registered: 10/16/05
Posts: 54
Loc: Upstate NY
I can't be there to protect you but I can tell you that you have the power to stand up to this man. You don't have to be afraid, he doesn't have any control over you. I bet he is actually frail and scared behind that powerful facade. I give to you all the strength you are ready to receive.


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#16409 - 11/18/05 05:47 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
shadowkid Offline
WARNING from ModTeam, September 2013: user "Shadowkid" was exposed as a hoaxer. His entire online persona and stories of sexual abuse were fiction. We encourage you not to become emotionally concerned by anything you see in any of his posts. Thank you
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/18/05
Posts: 2437
wow somebody will talk to me !thanks , well he's not frail or scared ,he is an animal ,at the time he abused me he weighed about 200 ,6ft 1 or 2,god only knows about now after almost 8 years behind bars .i just can't understand how our courts can lie ,make promises and not keep them to a child! i was at age 13 conned into going through a trial that was almost worse than the abuse with the promise that he would get life in prison.i spent two days starring at him and telling every disgusting thing he did to me or made me do .this man held me prisoner for 97 days abused me day and night for 3 months ,kept me locked in a tiny closet when he wasn't abusing me ,finally got tired of me and tried to kill me leaving me for dead in a ditch . he was charged with false imprisonement ,attempted murder ,and hundreds of sex charges . i found out after the trial he got a plea bargain 7 years !! 7 years for destroying me completly ,i will never be the same ,all the sex charges were dropped in favor of the attempted murder on which he was found guilty ,7 god damn years . i have to say he does still have control over me if i saw him today ,i know i would fall apart ,he didn't just control me ,he broke me ,he owned me ,one look from him and i would be an 11 year old boy again cowering in that stinking dark closet ,this is why i have to make sure i never come into contact with him again ,hey thanks for talking to me shadow

_________________________
its not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball - damien rice

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#16410 - 11/18/05 06:18 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
WalkingSouth Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/30/05
Posts: 16265
Hi Shadow,

I'm sitting here in tears reading about what happened to you. I can only imagine how terrible that must have been for you. Would it be OK if I gave you a cyber hug, I hope so 'cause it sure seems like you need one right now.

(((((((((((((((Shadow)))))))))))))))

I think you'll find there are a bunch of good guys here, Shadow. I hope you will hang around here with us. You'll find this is a good place to vent your frustrations and pain. Shout and scream if you want to. We'll listen and won't tell you not to feel the way you're feeling. You have every right to have those feelings and be angry. Let it out, Bro.

John

_________________________
“Life’s journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting ‘Holy ____…! What a ride!’” ~Hunter S. Thompson

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#16411 - 11/18/05 06:51 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
Derdlecar Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/08/05
Posts: 1314
Loc: Ogden Utah, USA
Greetings Shadow

My heart goes out to you. I have no idea what to say, about all I can do from here is listen (read). I can't imagin how much courage it took to tell us. And yes, there is a lot of us who not only will listen, but we are also very willing to talk to you.

The answer is there if you look.

Darrel

_________________________
If a man would get his life on track, he must first go back to the place where it was derailed.

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#16412 - 11/18/05 07:53 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
Nathan LaChine Offline
Webmaster
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/22/03
Posts: 5381
Loc: Washington State
Shadow,

I am always here to help when and where I can my friend. For what it is worth you did the right thing. You took a step in the right direction and nothign can change that. If he trys to bother you get a court order so he can not be around you. If he is call the police anytime he is around you. Their are always options my friend if you would like to talk please feel free to post on the forums. We are here to support you the best we can.


lots of love, Nathan


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#16414 - 11/18/05 03:00 PM Re: first timer scared crapless!
Ken Singer, LCSW Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/24/00
Posts: 5780
Loc: Lambertville, NJ USA
Before you do anything drastic, please understand that you have a lot more potential safeguards than you may be aware of.

He will likely have a parole officer assigned to him who can make his life a living hell if s/he wants or needs to. There should be a "no contact" condition of parole. Even staring at you, should he see you, could be considered contact and send him back to prison.

Sex offenders are under increasingly harsh conditions about where they can live, contact with former victims or children, etc.

Contact the prosecutor and or parole office where he will be released to. They are in business to protect you.

Ken Singer


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#16415 - 11/18/05 03:16 PM Re: first timer scared crapless!
george of kent Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/28/05
Posts: 305
Loc: delaware
I suspect that you have more strength, power and control over this situation than you give yourself credit for. I understand the source of the terror that you seem to be expressing, but that source does not have to control you any longer. Be careful, protect yourself, but don't panic.

_________________________
"We are only two and yet our howling can encircle the world's end.
Frightened, you are my only friend.
And frightened we are, every one.
Someone must take a stand -- Coward, take my coward's hand"
Arthur Laurents

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#16416 - 11/18/05 06:19 PM Re: first timer scared crapless!
fozzy_bear Offline
Member

Registered: 10/16/05
Posts: 54
Loc: Upstate NY
I agree, you took the right steps. I also agree that you should contact the parole officer and or the prosecution. You can stay a step or two ahead of him. I have no experience in sentencing or penal system but its not over when he gets out, he is not free to do whatever he wants without consequences. I can't speak for your state of mind at this time so you do what is best for you.

Just to clarify, I don't think the perp would be considered a sex offender since it was pleaded out. Something else I would let the parole officer know.


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#16417 - 11/19/05 05:35 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
shadowkid Offline
WARNING from ModTeam, September 2013: user "Shadowkid" was exposed as a hoaxer. His entire online persona and stories of sexual abuse were fiction. We encourage you not to become emotionally concerned by anything you see in any of his posts. Thank you
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/18/05
Posts: 2437
wow i gotta say i didn't expect anyone to even respond ,so this is cool ,i have tried so many times to talk about this stuff but nobody wanted to even hear it .has anybody been in foster care?i had 9 from age 13 to 18 ,and i was not allowed to talk about why i was there ,except when the real kids .bio kids i call them found out and teased me about it all i was was a state check each month for them .it's funny but i talked about everything with the police ,i told all in court ,but it made me feel worse not better .does talking about it really help? sorry if i'm taking too much space rambling on .i think when you been quiet for years once you start talking it takes a long time to get it all out.

_________________________
its not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball - damien rice

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#16418 - 11/19/05 05:41 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
shadowkid Offline
WARNING from ModTeam, September 2013: user "Shadowkid" was exposed as a hoaxer. His entire online persona and stories of sexual abuse were fiction. We encourage you not to become emotionally concerned by anything you see in any of his posts. Thank you
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/18/05
Posts: 2437
also my perp as you call it is on parole with a no contact order ,they sent me a letter when he got out.but you gotta understand this guy is not remotely normal ,going back to prison don't bother him ,he wrote me from prison saying he wanted to see me about some unfinished buissness ,that got him an extra 6 months .being a family member it is very hard to hide from him as some of my family are on his side they say he paid for what he did and i should forgive him .

_________________________
its not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball - damien rice

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#16419 - 11/19/05 06:02 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
WalkingSouth Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/30/05
Posts: 16265
Hi again Shadow,

You know what? You are absolutely NOT talking too much, and it does help. You are not taking up too much space, or rambling. Your thoughts about all this are very important. Not only will it help you to understand more about yourself and what you are feeling, but it helps us to understand more about ourselves also. Believe it or not.

You know, I'm almost envious of you being able to start confronting these devastating issues at your age. I was molested from ages 6 to 9. I went through all my teen years hating myself and ashamed of who I was. I had no friends for most of that time and was afraid of nearly everyone. Sometime during my late teens or early twentys I began repressing the memories because It was all just too much for me to deal with. Two + years ago it all came rushing back in a sickening flood. How I miss all those "lost" years. I envy you those years. You can start to deal with all of this while you are still young instead of waiting till you are nearly 50. I know it may seem like a heavy burden to you right now, but if you are willing to hang around here with us, we'll help you through the pain. We've been there. We understand what it's like to hurt and be angry about what we lost.

I hope this doesn't sound like a bunch of nonsense to you because I don't mean it to. I'm trying to say here that we really do care. About you.

You are so right about it taking a long time to get it all out. Be patient with yourself. Talk about it all you want. That is what this place is for.

Take time to love yourself. You are a very special person, Shadow. Every one is.

Courage my Friend,

John

_________________________
“Life’s journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting ‘Holy ____…! What a ride!’” ~Hunter S. Thompson

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#16420 - 11/19/05 06:44 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
shadowkid Offline
WARNING from ModTeam, September 2013: user "Shadowkid" was exposed as a hoaxer. His entire online persona and stories of sexual abuse were fiction. We encourage you not to become emotionally concerned by anything you see in any of his posts. Thank you
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/18/05
Posts: 2437
thanks so much i been waiting so long for somebody to listen

_________________________
its not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball - damien rice

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#16421 - 11/19/05 07:17 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
WalkingSouth Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/30/05
Posts: 16265
No problem, Bro. We listen because everyone of us have been there in one way or another and we know what it feels like to not be heard...

Hugs

_________________________
“Life’s journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting ‘Holy ____…! What a ride!’” ~Hunter S. Thompson

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#16422 - 11/19/05 08:32 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
Morning Star Offline
Member

Registered: 12/21/04
Posts: 1124
Loc: Home
A SHADOW OF ME

Shadow, today you shined
and filled me with your light.

Listening to your story
I realized,it was high time
I got over mine.

I also decided to
honour your courage
by finding some of mine.

Shadows melt away
at the face of light.

And when the light lies within you,
shadows don't stand a chance.

What those three long months
couldn’t destroy in you
was the light, that is you!

_________________________
~ It's over!...Let go of Thy Past, Remember Thy Self ~

Why Don't People Heal, by Caroline Myss; 30 days to clean up your vibrations - Abraham-Hicks

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#16423 - 11/19/05 08:43 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
shadowkid Offline
WARNING from ModTeam, September 2013: user "Shadowkid" was exposed as a hoaxer. His entire online persona and stories of sexual abuse were fiction. We encourage you not to become emotionally concerned by anything you see in any of his posts. Thank you
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/18/05
Posts: 2437
morning star now that was cool !! i love it!i think i had more courage at 13 than i do now.it's just when i think of him ,i don't know it's like my insides just melt ,there is so much fear and i can't control it .

_________________________
its not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball - damien rice

Top
#16424 - 11/19/05 01:48 PM Re: first timer scared crapless!
MB57 Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 03/24/05
Posts: 15
Loc: IA, USA
You are so brave. Keep up the fight. Luck is always by the side of brave people. It is just a trick your mind is playing. I did not even speak about abuse for 35 years and ashamed of the memories. For you fight this at 13 is great step.
Remember No adult Victims. We are all here to listen/read whaever you write. Please keep writting that is way you are going to get rid of the fear. God bless you.


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#16425 - 11/19/05 03:40 PM Re: first timer scared crapless!
george of kent Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/28/05
Posts: 305
Loc: delaware
Some of your family is "on his side"? What kind of assholes are we dealing with here? This is outrageous!
Forgive? Well, maybe, some day, a thousand million years from now. Maybe.
Forget? NEVER.
He may (not really) have paid his "debt" to society, but he can never repay the little shadow kid inside you.
Stay alert, protect yourself, don't do anything rash or impulsive. Take some deep breaths. You are very brave. Love, etc.,

_________________________
"We are only two and yet our howling can encircle the world's end.
Frightened, you are my only friend.
And frightened we are, every one.
Someone must take a stand -- Coward, take my coward's hand"
Arthur Laurents

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#16426 - 11/19/05 03:48 PM Re: first timer scared crapless!
fozzy_bear Offline
Member

Registered: 10/16/05
Posts: 54
Loc: Upstate NY
I believe fear is the root of all our thoughts. Look at any other trauma based condition and fear is the debilitating factor. It is so natural to feel fear, fear can make us fight or make us take flight. The more you understand your fear the more you can understand yourself.

If you are in danger, than by all means do what you need to protect yourself. Don't second guess or feel bad because others are telling you not to be. It sounds like this is where you are at this time in your life or maybe not. This are things you talk about one on one with a therapist. Us older guys have been caring around fear for so long it clouds our thoughts. Fear is good when you need it and bad when you don't.


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#16427 - 11/20/05 08:56 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
Whicker Offline
Member

Registered: 11/01/03
Posts: 117
Loc: Pastures of Oregon
ShadowKid,

I replied to your Post, but was apparently too militant in my perspective. (it was removed)

Protect yourself by all legal means available to you.

Don't hesitate in visiting here, and sharing your thoughts with other male survivors. Most of us can relate to your feelings and even if not, are here to listen to you in your time(s) of need.

Whicker

_________________________
Esse Quam Videri
(To be, rather than to seem)

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#16428 - 11/23/05 02:53 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
endlessjourney Offline
Member

Registered: 11/01/05
Posts: 518
Loc: Cincinnati Ohio
Hey shadow, I'm Jason. I know you're really scared right now but keep in mind that you had already stood up to him once. I couldn't imagine anything more gutwrenching than describing (in detail) in front of your perp and a whole court room what he had done to you. Not many have the courage to do that. When a situation comes if it comes, that courage will more than likely be there. Just remember what happened to him the last time he hurt you, I know he does. I'm sure he wants you to be scared. Fear is a natural reaction but don't let it control you. Fear is what kept us in the dark for so long. Take pride in what you did. Remember, you can see to it that he goes back to where he came from if he tries something. You are in control now. What helps me out in similar situations is when I'm alone, I simply say "F--K him!" over and over again with conviction. It helps me to get pissed. When I get pissed, the fear subsides temporarily. When i get mad, I almost want to run into my perp just to show him that he cant control me. (However, if you're really mad at the time, i would try to avoid him because being emotional can backfire on you). Be careful, but be confident, you came out on top last time and you were 13. Now you are 21 and are more in control of yourself than you were then. He could be the biggest toughest badass in town but, the strongest part of the body is your mind. You can always, talk and express yourself to us in this sight. You're definitely in the right place.

Jason

_________________________
Truth is the very reason we strive to live. It surrounds and resides within us. Accepting the truths we already know and seeking out those we do not is a direct path to inner balance and joy. For life is not a means to an end, but a journey. Life comes and goes but the truth will always live on.

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#16429 - 11/23/05 03:52 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Shadow,

Please remember a few things. First, as you can see from Ken's post (he is a social worker so he knows), your perp would be in serious trouble if he tried even to contact you or come close to you. Cowards may like to make threats from prison, but usually they do not relish the idea of returning to prison.

Another thing, bro, is that you are remembering how things were when you were 13 and a terrified boy. You are an adult now, and there are a lot of resources at your disposal. If you feel frightened that is normal, but don't let him get any clue of that. Talk to us here, to friends you trust, and make sure you have the name, address, and contact details for the prosecutor who handled his case and his parole officer.

Do you see what he is trying to do, by the way? He is trying to get his kicks through control and intimidation, which is what abuse is really all about. If he thinks this effort is failing he may simply lose interest. But if you have any fears or insecurities, let the relevant authorities know right away.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#16430 - 11/23/05 04:02 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
shadowkid Offline
WARNING from ModTeam, September 2013: user "Shadowkid" was exposed as a hoaxer. His entire online persona and stories of sexual abuse were fiction. We encourage you not to become emotionally concerned by anything you see in any of his posts. Thank you
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/18/05
Posts: 2437
i wish i had people around when i was 13 sure could have used some advice back then .after 10 years of being told to never talk about it ,to be ashamed of it i found a place where i can talk and people will listen !! i'm amazed .thanks so much for showing me i'm not the only one like this.i have contacted the people who put him in jail but they say if he don't break parole they can't touch him ,he has rights you know!!!i have been trying to post my story on that forum ,if you read it you will understand my fear ,this man owned me heart and soul ,i gave up completly to him to stay alive ,he broke my mind and he still has the key to my soul . shadow

_________________________
its not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball - damien rice

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#16431 - 11/23/05 04:07 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Shadow,

I know how you feel bro. But there is so MUCH difference between you then and you now, and part of that is you don't have to stay silent and feel ashamed any longer. Yes, your perp has rights, but so do you. If he crosses the line even a bit he is in DEEP shit.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#16432 - 11/23/05 06:18 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
Morning Star Offline
Member

Registered: 12/21/04
Posts: 1124
Loc: Home
SCARED TO SACRED

The day I was full of fears, I didn’t feel God besides me. My journey away from being scared has been the one of discovering the sacred in me.

It is not the actual event that destroys us, what destroys our life is our own fear of it.
And then one day we realise, all that fear wasn't real.

_________________________
~ It's over!...Let go of Thy Past, Remember Thy Self ~

Why Don't People Heal, by Caroline Myss; 30 days to clean up your vibrations - Abraham-Hicks

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#16433 - 11/23/05 07:30 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
melliferal Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/03/05
Posts: 1159
Quote:
Originally posted by shadowkid:
i;m not too sure how this works ,but i'm shadow and i sure could use some help ,i think most of my problem right now is how much our courts let me down .i put him away ,now he is out and he is going to get me ,i just know it .if anyone asked me if they should prosecute someone my advice would be NO. i'm 21 now ,i was 13 when he went to jail .if anybody wants to talk please let me know shadow
I sit here in a warmish room some 1500 miles from where my abuse took place, which was in San Antonio, Texas. I do not see myself visiting that town again. Am I afraid of meeting my perpetrators again? Quite possibly. I never turned them in; to this day they could be free as birds, free to do to other children what they did to me. Or, they could've stopped and now live perfectly moral lives. Perhaps one of their victims - aye, even their own children - may have turned them in, or they've been busted in some sort of sting operation and are now languishing in prison. But I wouldn't know. They could still be 1500 miles away. They could live two streets over. -I don't know-. Should I make an effort to find out? Do I have to confront them? I don't think it's necessary, I don't believe it would accomplish anything, and there are reasons I feel that way that are particular to my situation. But whatever the situation, I don't think you HAVE to confront, if you don't want to. And if that ends up meaning NEVER confronting, that's fine. As it stands, I think you've done your "confronting" already; there's no need for any more.

You see people here talking about parole officers and restraining orders; it's good advice, but down inside you don't really believe they'll work, do you? They're the wares of a system which, in your personal experience, isn't particularly trustworthy. And anonymous names on a website probably don't outrank your personal experience. So you remain uncertain.

If I may offer a suggestion, do not overlook JapanZen's very powerful advice. If you feel unsafe - if the paperwork doesn't convince you, if the locks don't look very sturdy suddenly - there is nothing wrong with seeking shelter elsewhere. Perhaps moving to Japan is a bit too extreme for you - but go as far as you think you need to, be it a friend's house or Aunt Ella's in Reno. Drop out of sight and set up on your own somewhere - it CAN be done. It's not a matter of "courage" or "standing your ground". It's not "letting him win", it's not "living in fear". It's about security and peace of mind. And however far you go in your recovery (should you choose to recover), the one thing that is certain is that you won't go anywhere as long as you're constantly looking over your shoulder.

Wherever you go, I hope that you will return here. Take some time and read. You won't find a story exactly like yours here - and you won't need to; you'll still be able to relate. No two stories here are the same, and yet they are all the same. We each stand in our own little back-alleys, but they all branch off the same street. And having been down that same street is what allows us to trust each other with things we can't trust anybody else with.

_________________________
Children cannot consent; they can only comply.

Oprah's resources for male survivors

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#16434 - 11/23/05 08:45 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
Derdlecar Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/08/05
Posts: 1314
Loc: Ogden Utah, USA
Shadow

There is alot of advice posted above. Some I agree with and some I don't but who am I to tell you that. who knows? the advice I think stinks may be the best for you. You have a whole truck load or replies to your post. To me, that means that the people here love you. We care because we too have been victomized. We have felt the fear and pain, the anger and frustration. No human should ever have to walk this road but here we are.

Don't be amazed that we talk to you. We come here because we also need help. We also come here because it is a place were we can help each other.

Anyway, you are the one to to decide what is right for you. Go in confidence my friend. Keep us posted, we will reply.

Hang in there my friend

Darrel

_________________________
If a man would get his life on track, he must first go back to the place where it was derailed.

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#16435 - 11/23/05 11:03 AM Re: first timer scared crapless!
Morning Star Offline
Member

Registered: 12/21/04
Posts: 1124
Loc: Home
We all speak from our personal experiences, and they might differ from yours verily. So naturally, our opinions would be tinted by our individual life experiences and some advices would be biased by our unfinished emotional businesses.

So you may do what I did, read every one's advice, but followed my own inner voice.

One more thing, I would rather have you strong and free, rather than follow my advice. So I would rather have you get lost four times, and make your own way than follow my way. Because in the end your way is your and mine way is mine. Though your goal is mine.

It might make me feel good for while that you followed MY advise but in the end whats best for you, only God knows and you.

_________________________
~ It's over!...Let go of Thy Past, Remember Thy Self ~

Why Don't People Heal, by Caroline Myss; 30 days to clean up your vibrations - Abraham-Hicks

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#16436 - 11/23/05 04:52 PM Re: first timer scared crapless!
george of kent Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/28/05
Posts: 305
Loc: delaware
Just "hangin' in there" with you.
Our conflicting suggestions, above, may be confusing and even possibly unhelpful in the aggregate; but, individually, they do represent the thoughts of each caring, supportive individual man here who each only wants for you to be strong, happy and safe. Do what you have to do; trust your gut at least as much as you trust your head; stay in touch.
Love, etc.,

_________________________
"We are only two and yet our howling can encircle the world's end.
Frightened, you are my only friend.
And frightened we are, every one.
Someone must take a stand -- Coward, take my coward's hand"
Arthur Laurents

Top
#16437 - 11/23/05 08:17 PM Re: first timer scared crapless!
Muldoon Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/30/02
Posts: 1428
Loc: St Paul MN
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Quote:
it's funny but i talked about everything with the police ,i told all in court ,but it made me feel worse not better .does talking about it really help?
Talking about this realy does help.
I am so angery with the system and how they have treated you.

You shoul;d of been given professional help back when you told at the age of 13. What the system did to you was a direct violeantion of your rights. The court should of given you the help of professional Therapy as so as the court case was over.

They should of never dropped the sexual abuse charges againest him. Now he doesn't even have to register as a SEX Ofender

I think that the state should have to pay for all the professional help you need now. I would try to look for a ADVCATE to work for you all all these issues.

See if there is a Victims Advcate in your state that can help you.

You have lots of rights and most of them where violented by the system.

If i can be of any help let me know.

You went through a hellish experence as a kid and the grownups that should of helped failed you in every way popssible.
Be Strong and let all your brother here up you on your HEALING jourany.
Tom

_________________________
Teach the Children to Never Hide in the Silence

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