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#164048 - 06/29/07 02:58 PM Reoccurring dreams as a child?
Army Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/27/07
Posts: 90
Loc: California
Hey guys,

I was wondering if anyone else has had reoccuring dreams as a boy that involved sexual abuse? I have some that I remember having many times. More recently, I had a dream about my dad abusing me, I woke up in the middle of the night and it was a wet dream. I don't specifically remember that abuse, but obviously, my body reacted to it. Just looking for someone who might be able to help me here.

Army

_________________________
07 Peebbles WOR Alummni

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#164073 - 06/29/07 06:07 PM Re: Reoccurring dreams as a child? [Re: Army]
knot4sail16 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/19/07
Posts: 44
Loc: Southeastern U.S.
It happens to me all the time. sometimes they are of what really happened, sometimes they are new scenarios that the mind creates. I know they can be really scary and unsettling. sorry you are having to deal with these.


Peace,
Daniel

_________________________
letting the broken pieces be shaped into something new and beautiful is the greatest joy and struggle of this journey

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#164075 - 06/29/07 06:12 PM Re: Reoccurring dreams as a child? [Re: knot4sail16]
Army Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/27/07
Posts: 90
Loc: California
Thanks for the encouraging words, your right it was very unsettling.

_________________________
07 Peebbles WOR Alummni

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#164085 - 06/29/07 06:57 PM Re: Reoccurring dreams as a child? [Re: Army]
knot4sail16 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/19/07
Posts: 44
Loc: Southeastern U.S.
also welcome to the site.

Peace,
Daniel

_________________________
letting the broken pieces be shaped into something new and beautiful is the greatest joy and struggle of this journey

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#164187 - 06/30/07 01:29 PM Re: Reoccurring dreams as a child? [Re: knot4sail16]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Army,

Welcome to Male Survivor. I hope you will continue to post and talk about things; we have a great bunch of people here and you will find a lot of support and understanding.

Yes, I used to have one recurring dream that turned out to be about the abuse, though I didn't see it that way at the time. These dreams just reflect our mind's effort to process things it's working on while we sleep.

Don't feel awkward about the wet dream occurring in the context of a dream about abuse. We are all sexual beings and the body will respond to sexual stimulation of all sorts, even if it's something we don't want and don't like.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#164193 - 06/30/07 04:54 PM Re: Reoccurring dreams as a child? [Re: roadrunner]
Army Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/27/07
Posts: 90
Loc: California
Larry,

Thanks for the thougths. It is nice to finally be able to talk about this. I don't feel so alone, and to hear others have experienced simmalar things is comforting. I have read several of your responses to other members, I can see your a kind and compassionate man! Best to you!

Army

_________________________
07 Peebbles WOR Alummni

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#164217 - 06/30/07 09:26 PM Re: Reoccurring dreams as a child? [Re: Army]
terpprm Offline
Guest

Registered: 06/15/07
Posts: 312
Loc: Elyria, Ohio
yes. i had one that has nothing to do with the sexual abuse per say, but i do connect it to that, as they did not start until after it happened. i have this one, maybe once a month, sometimes more: its real dark. i can't see anything but myself(i dream in 3rd person, color, and sound). i'm running from something, still don't know what it is. i'm running, not moving, not getting anywhere. so i'm basically running in place. i'm weeping, and whatever or whoever is getting closer. then just as "it" reaches out to grab me, i wake up panicing! i end up crying everytime and it seems like each time is more scary.


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#164224 - 06/30/07 09:49 PM Re: Reoccurring dreams as a child? [Re: terpprm]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
terpprm,

Yeah, geez, I remember that crap! I would wake up trembling and crying in my bed sometimes, and of course I felt it would be stupid to go tell my Mom and Dad what had happened. But now I wish I had! Well, I wish I had done a lot of things back then though, lol. Like tell them about the abuse.

I find that it helps when we understand these problems. Dreams involving running, being grabbed, and getting caught are very common in kids who have been through some kind of trauma in which they felt threatened. VERY common, and VERY scary, is the "running in place" dream, where no matter how hard you try you see you will be caught.

Those dreams are the brain rehearsing its options next time a threat comes up, and the "running in place" theme usually reflects a feeling of doom or helplessness.

For what it's worth, I would suggest that when you have such a dream and wake up, you just turn on the light, get up and go have a glass of tea, milk, or whatever will calm you down - but not alcohol lol!! Look around and see that it's safe, and maybe read for a few minutes.

And here's the best advice of all...get a stuffed animal. I'm serious! I live in Europe now and am visiting relatives in PA, but my stuffed dog Bongo came with me and he's in my bed every night. Too old for stuffed animals? Fuck that. Stuffed animals rule, and if having one helps me sleep, hey, it's going to be in bed with me! \:\)

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#164230 - 06/30/07 10:25 PM Re: Reoccurring dreams as a child? [Re: roadrunner]
terpprm Offline
Guest

Registered: 06/15/07
Posts: 312
Loc: Elyria, Ohio
my comfort is a body pillow i stick between my legs, partly because i have mild scoliosis, and it helps set my back. but i stick it between my legs and snuggle up to it. and same as you, i don't care who thinks what! i do what is best for me. something i find wierd though, i sleep better at other peoples houses rather than my own. and my sexual abuse didn't happen in my home, it happened at the guys house.


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#164231 - 06/30/07 10:28 PM Re: Reoccurring dreams as a child? [Re: roadrunner]
trusty Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/14/07
Posts: 167
Loc: Indiana, USA
Dear Army and others,
As a child being abused I had a recurring dream literally hundreds of times--the exact same dream over and over. It was directly related to my abuse in a Freudian sense. I told my family about it all the time, but no one ever put two and two together and figured out that something real in my life was causing this frightening nightmare.

In the last three months, since I've been in therapy and really have begun to deal with my abuse (some 42 years after it ended), I am having lots of nightmares. My wife said I was kicking and yelling out in my sleep last night...it was a bad one. I know this will all fade away someday, as I'm making wonderful progress in therapy. Telling other people about my childhood horrors is helping.

So, Army, you've done the right thing to share. We can all help each other. Thank you for bringing this one up for discussion.

Blessings,
REJ

_________________________
"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

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