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#69000 - 07/10/05 11:33 PM I'm new here
Ryan Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/10/05
Posts: 16
Loc: Gaineville, GA
Hi,

I'm totally new here so please excuse the ignorance. I haven't posted anything yet because I have no idea what may or may not be construed as a 'trigger'.
This is allnew to me. I've been seeing a therapist for about a month due to depression and anxiety. Because of both my parents' multiple marriages, my therapist suggested I try to get my dad to talk to me about certain questions I had. Well, about a week ago, I did and through talking to him and my sister, there are things that I'm now remembering.
I'd like to somehow get my point across and share my thoughts and find support here. But, like I said, I don't what a trigger would be and don't want to upset anybody. So, if someone would be so kind as to inform me on what's what, I'd appreciate it because this stuff is killing me.

Thanks, Ryan


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#69002 - 07/11/05 02:50 AM Re: I'm new here
Don-NY Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/06/02
Posts: 546
Loc: Long Island, NY
Welcome Ryan,

Sorry you have to be here. Jasper has given you good advice, but the following link contains the discussion board guidlines which may answer some questions and provide some guidance.

http://malesurvivor.org/cgi-local/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=1;t=005143

Donald

_________________________
If you understand everything, some things are just as they are. If you understand nothing, things are still just as they are.

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#69003 - 07/11/05 03:30 AM Re: I'm new here
sophiesdad Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/30/05
Posts: 462
Loc: Florida
Welcome, Ryan. The others have pretty much said it all about the posting and triggers. I just wanted to add that sometimes when you are new, there are things that you may feel uncomfortable posting on the "public" board. As you get to know some of us, you may feel more comfortable at times using the PM (Private Messaging) system.

Don't feel like you're intruding on anyone with PMs - I can only speak for myself, but if I didn't want to have messages sent to me, I would have removed that feature from my profile. AND, if you do happen to write someone who is not in the space to help right now, they will usually write back and let you know.

YOu will find this place filled with very caring individuals who have gone through some of the same things that you endured when you were younger. We can truly say that we understand.

Groups are ALWAYS a good companion to individual therapy because you get feedback from a bunch of people. Sometimes (and I'm speaking from my own experience), one person can make an observation and it sort of goes in one ear and out the other - especially if it's something we don't want to hear. But, when five, six, seven people are making the same observation, you can pretty much trust that it's a valid point.

With that said, I welcome you and hope that you will find this place one of support and healing.

SD

_________________________
There are no unresolved issues - they just didn't resolve themselves the way we would have liked. "Grinder and Bandler - Neuro-Linguistic Programming"

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#160983 - 06/10/07 01:04 PM Re: I'm new here [Re: sophiesdad]
Arjay369 Offline
New Here

Registered: 06/10/07
Posts: 3
Loc: Georgia, USA
I'm back. This is Ryan. It's been a long time but I've decided to come back. It's good to have a place to come back to every now and again. (even if it has been a couple of years) Lot's of things have happened.

Last time I was here, I was taking care of my uncle while having to deal with new found memories of abuse I was previously unaware of. At that time, I was seeing one T but changed to another one more suited for me and my issues. I was also on meds.

Well, I cared for my uncle until his passing. Acquired a job at a hospital and lost it 6 months later. Moved across the state to live closer to my sister. Worked in construction and then moved another six months later.

Now, I'm in a live-in relationship, working as a restaurant server, and, of course, still dealing with the memories. At the moment, I'm in a good place. I have my moments where flashbacks might be triggered and I break down and have to be held close and tight until it passes. I won't deny I need to be on meds again (it helps to keep my thoughts focused and not 'looping' around past events) and I could use a T to talk to about things (let's face it, sometimes you just don't want to share everything with your partner for the feeling of being a burden.)

But, yeah, I'm good and in an alright place. How is everyone?

_________________________
Expect the unexpected, accept the unaccepted.

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#160989 - 06/10/07 03:06 PM Re: I'm new here [Re: Arjay369]
Scoutvictim Offline
Guest

Registered: 06/04/07
Posts: 434
Loc: St. Louis, Missouri
Ryan,

Although I'm new here also, I want to welcome you back.

Get settled, and come on back in, the water is fine. LOL

Hope to chat soon.

Luv ya,
Carl

_________________________
Shawn and Ben will always be in my heart....

Happiness is like peeing your pants; Everyone can see it, but only YOU feel the warmth.

Peebles, Ohio WOR alumni, Oct. 2007

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#161004 - 06/10/07 05:02 PM Re: I'm new here [Re: Scoutvictim]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Ryan,

I'm glad you came back. I hope you will get back into the feel of things on the site and post about whatever concerns you. We are all here for you.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#161033 - 06/10/07 07:49 PM Re: I'm new here [Re: Ryan]
gatorboy Offline
New Here

Registered: 06/10/07
Posts: 1
Ryan, I am grateful to you for your post because when I read the guidelines on this website, I was befuddled and confused. I am new as well, and I'm not looking to drain moderators of their energy, create acrimony, or upset anyone, either. So, I guess we'll just have to learn the ropes and go with the flow.

Gatorboy


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#161057 - 06/10/07 10:39 PM Re: I'm new here [Re: gatorboy]
Arjay369 Offline
New Here

Registered: 06/10/07
Posts: 3
Loc: Georgia, USA
thanks scout, road, and gator..it's nice to know i'm in a safe place and can find help when i need it as well as provide help when i can. hope to talk to all of you soon.

hugs,
ryan

_________________________
Expect the unexpected, accept the unaccepted.

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