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#160790 - 06/08/07 10:55 PM You!
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6906
Loc: FEMA Region 1
You hacked me apart
You used me
You fucked me
You…

You trained me
You showed me
You made me good at it
You…

You HAD me
I HAD you
You needed me
I needed you!
You…

You kissed me
You needed me
You owned me
You…

You left me…

You…

_________________________
My fault? How's this my fault? [Dean Vernon Wormer, 1978]

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#160801 - 06/09/07 01:29 AM Re: You! [Re: Still]
shadowkid Offline
WARNING from ModTeam, September 2013: user "Shadowkid" was exposed as a hoaxer. His entire online persona and stories of sexual abuse were fiction. We encourage you not to become emotionally concerned by anything you see in any of his posts. Thank you
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/18/05
Posts: 2437
bastard

_________________________
its not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball - damien rice

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#160828 - 06/09/07 07:21 AM Re: You! [Re: shadowkid]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Geez Rob, I'm not sure I ever saw anything like this before. Good for you though. It's important you got this out and are able to share it. And most important of all, you place the blame where it belongs. I hope writing this and sharing it will help you on your healing journey.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#160830 - 06/09/07 08:35 AM Re: You! [Re: roadrunner]
healingpartner Offline
Guest

Registered: 04/04/07
Posts: 407
I would only add to shadows response

fucking bastard


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#160833 - 06/09/07 09:43 AM Re: You! [Re: healingpartner]
pietie Offline
Guest

Registered: 01/23/07
Posts: 326
Loc: South Africa
Ditto to all the above!!

_________________________
Not Perfect, just forgiven

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#160860 - 06/09/07 12:43 PM Re: You! [Re: Still]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Rob,

Originally Posted By: Robbie Brown
You left me...

You


I hope you know -and believe - that it's absolutely normal for a boy to feel abandoned when the abuse ends, even if he hated and feared the abuse while it was happening. I remember how it felt when I was 14: I actually grieved for the abuser, thinking that he had abandoned me and that I must have done something just horrible to deserve for even him to toss me aside.

These are the feelings of wrecked and confused boys, Rob. We are not to blame for these sentiments or for any of the things that might have happened as a result later on.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
#160970 - 06/10/07 10:42 AM Re: You! [Re: roadrunner]
Bobby Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/01/04
Posts: 1287
Loc: Arizona
Rob......... Bobby

_________________________
I'm healing now, and I wasn't sure I would.




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#161065 - 06/11/07 12:13 AM Re: You! [Re: roadrunner]
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6906
Loc: FEMA Region 1
Originally Posted By: roadrunner
Geez Rob, I'm not sure I ever saw anything like this before.


A dubious (sounding) distinction Larry!

_________________________
My fault? How's this my fault? [Dean Vernon Wormer, 1978]

Top
#161127 - 06/11/07 02:15 PM Re: You! [Re: Still]
FormerTexan Offline
Site Administrator
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 09/12/04
Posts: 11463
Loc: Denver, CO
"You left me...

You"


"I actually grieved for the abuser.."

Same with me and that #$%&! down the street.

_________________________


Money talks, but all it tells me is goodbye.

If I could meet myself as a boy...

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#219411 - 04/21/08 12:03 AM Re: You! [Re: FormerTexan]
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6906
Loc: FEMA Region 1
You know what?
You know who!
You did this!
You caused that

You got to play
I still pay

Am I crazy, or is it You?
You said
You did
You took

You felt great
I complied

You called
I came
You called
I ran – I’m here – please don’t tell

Do You know?
Do You care?
I’m still here
You still there?

_________________________
My fault? How's this my fault? [Dean Vernon Wormer, 1978]

Top
#219461 - 04/21/08 10:24 AM Re: You! [Re: Still]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Robbie,

The madness is all on his side, my friend. Your poem, like the first one, does a great job of pointing out where the blame lies.

And you are the one who is doing all the talking now. That's great. You have broken the silence, which is what abusers most want when they think back to what they have done.

I remember how terrible it was wondering when the next time would be. Let the abusers wonder when the knock will come on their door. Maybe that's the greatest punishment of all.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
#359265 - 04/10/11 07:03 PM Re: You! [Re: Still]
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6906
Loc: FEMA Region 1
Its all still true though...but I've got to re-frame it off of my back

_________________________
My fault? How's this my fault? [Dean Vernon Wormer, 1978]

Top
#359326 - 04/11/11 01:20 PM Re: You! [Re: Bobby]
Rusty563 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/11
Posts: 209
Loc: Anywhere, USA
May he rot in hell forever.

Rusty

_________________________
There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you - Maya Angelous
Freedom is never voluntarily given by the oppressor; it must be demanded by the oppressed - Martin Luther King
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5qF_qbaWt3Q
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KDOkMSf-F14

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#359327 - 04/11/11 01:21 PM Re: You! [Re: Bobby]
Rusty563 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/11
Posts: 209
Loc: Anywhere, USA
May he rot in hell forever.

Rusty

_________________________
There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you - Maya Angelous
Freedom is never voluntarily given by the oppressor; it must be demanded by the oppressed - Martin Luther King
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5qF_qbaWt3Q
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KDOkMSf-F14

Top
#359329 - 04/11/11 02:06 PM Re: You! [Re: Rusty563]
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6906
Loc: FEMA Region 1
Its acually sadness, rather than anger.

_________________________
My fault? How's this my fault? [Dean Vernon Wormer, 1978]

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