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#159368 - 06/01/07 04:02 PM Mom pimps 12 year old son
onlyakid Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/31/04
Posts: 1552
Loc: New Jersey
York-area (PA) woman charged with raping boy, 12
(Full story at http://www.yorkdispatch.com/local/ci_6037755 )

A 24-year-old York-area woman is charged in Lancaster County with having a sexual relationship with a 12-year-old boy that was arranged by the boy's mother. Police say Ashley Laurie Banks paid the boy's mother in exchange for sex with the boy on a nightly basis at a home in Columbia, Lancaster County, between August 2005 and December 2005, according to an affidavit of probable cause....

The relationship came to light after the boy told a Lancaster County Children and Youth Services worker in September that he was being sexually assaulted, according to the documents.

He told the CYS worker that he was being "prostituted" by his mother, the documents state. At the time of the relationship, he was 12 and Banks was 22 years old, the documents state.


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#160113 - 06/05/07 09:39 PM Re: Mom pimps 12 year old son [Re: onlyakid]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
I know we aren't supposed to compare, but it seems to me that there's something especially vile and evil about a person who would betray his or her own flesh and blood. My heart absolutely aches for my brothers here who were abused or otherwise betrayed by their parents or siblings. I just don't know how I could have survived that.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#160235 - 06/06/07 11:10 AM Re: Mom pimps 12 year old son [Re: roadrunner]
dean1320 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/06/07
Posts: 129
Loc: Atlanta, GA , US
Sick bitch!!!!

_________________________
NEVER QUIT .

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#160577 - 06/08/07 02:45 AM Re: Mom pimps 12 year old son [Re: dean1320]
Chain Breaker Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/21/07
Posts: 376
Loc: Michigan
AAAAARRRRGH!!!!!!!!

Keep me away from her!!

_________________________
My name is Joe. I am a survivor and a good man. You can count on me.

CB

"[Insert your name here], I am [Chain Breaker]. Do you see that I am your friend? Can you see that you will always be my friend?"
--Wind In His Hair, Dances With Wolves

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#160641 - 06/08/07 10:28 AM Re: Mom pimps 12 year old son [Re: Chain Breaker]
AJC Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/01/07
Posts: 108
Loc: Illinois, USA
I sometimes find myself comparing and feeling stupid that I am so messed up by what happened to me compared to the more traumatic, horrific things that happened to others.

I know I shouldn't, but I do.

-Andrew


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#160656 - 06/08/07 12:12 PM Re: Mom pimps 12 year old son [Re: AJC]
pain4ever Offline


Registered: 04/05/01
Posts: 1032
Any abuse...no matter if it was once..or a thousand times does horrific damage...never compare!

_________________________
Peace and Tranquility all depends on your frame of reference.

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#160686 - 06/08/07 02:13 PM Re: Mom pimps 12 year old son [Re: pain4ever]
FormerTexan Offline
Site Administrator
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 09/12/04
Posts: 11056
Loc: Denver, CO
Andrew,

Your pain is just as valid as anyone else's. Everyone thinks differently about things and see them different from others. My abuse seems like a walk in the park compared to others, yet I wouldn't wish on anyone what I dealt with. Invalidating your pain or past through comparing can hinder you from moving forward with healing.

_________________________
List of things ain't nobody got time for:

1. That


If I could meet myself as a boy...

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#160762 - 06/08/07 09:00 PM Re: Mom pimps 12 year old son *UPDATE* [Re: onlyakid]
onlyakid Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/31/04
Posts: 1552
Loc: New Jersey
http://www.ydr.com/newsfull/ci_6046839

An update: Boy's mother has been charged with criminal conspiracy to rape a child and endangering the welfare of a child. Also new details as to the mother's involvement

“The mom knew about it ... allowed it go on,” Detective Bell said. “A month or so later ... she extorted the woman (Banks), saying, 'I'll go to authorities if you don't supply me with cocaine.'”

Also the abuse didn't end until the boy moved to another part of the state to live with his father.

_________________________
"Being with people that understand you...Priceless"

"and i don't want the world to see me, cause i don't think that they'd understand"

"You don't know what love is...you just do as your told"

"My life has changed. What you take as a simple thing, is not so simple for me anymore"


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#161251 - 06/12/07 07:53 AM Re: Mom pimps 12 year old son [Re: AJC]
ecb Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/04/03
Posts: 205
Originally Posted By: AJC
I sometimes find myself comparing and feeling stupid that I am so messed up by what happened to me compared to the more traumatic, horrific things that happened to others.

I know I shouldn't, but I do.

-Andrew


Yea I do this too.


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#161608 - 06/14/07 05:14 PM Re: Mom pimps 12 year old son [Re: ecb]
philobat Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/31/07
Posts: 293
Loc: California
To some degree I think most of us do the comparison thing. I have and felt bad about it. Now, I am just getting used to all of things we do and not beating myself up about it anymore.


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#161810 - 06/16/07 08:10 AM Re: Mom pimps 12 year old son [Re: onlyakid]
WesQ Offline
Guest

Registered: 06/10/07
Posts: 31
Loc: Norcross, Georgia, USA
*sob* Why people do such cruel things to children, I have no clue.

I am glad that the boy sought out help from CYS and I hope he is protected now.

Ugh!

_________________________
" You gotta make your own kind of music
Sing your own special song
Make your own kind music
Even if nobody else sings along"

From "Make Your Own Kind of Music" by Mama Cass Elliott of the Mamas and Papas

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#161811 - 06/16/07 08:10 AM Re: Mom pimps 12 year old son *UPDATE* [Re: onlyakid]
WesQ Offline
Guest

Registered: 06/10/07
Posts: 31
Loc: Norcross, Georgia, USA
the mother needs to be put away for a while!

_________________________
" You gotta make your own kind of music
Sing your own special song
Make your own kind music
Even if nobody else sings along"

From "Make Your Own Kind of Music" by Mama Cass Elliott of the Mamas and Papas

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#162124 - 06/18/07 11:39 AM Re: Mom pimps 12 year old son [Re: AJC]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Andrew and others,

Originally Posted By: AJC
I sometimes find myself comparing and feeling stupid that I am so messed up by what happened to me compared to the more traumatic, horrific things that happened to others.

I know I shouldn't, but I do.


I think it's a natural tendency to look at the cases of other guys to draw comparisons, and in some ways that can be useful. It's in this way that we discover, for example, that we are not alone and that others have had similar problems. We can learn from the experiences of others and it's empowering to find that our comments can be helpful to others. Comparison is a way of discovering similarities and differences and it opens a lot of useful doors for us.

Where we have to draw the line, however, is on matters of value and judgment. We have to remember that our own abuse experience is of special importance to us specifically because it's ours. This case of abuse is the one that has hurt us. This is the one from which we need to recover. That makes it crucial to us, and this importance isn't touched by whatever others may have endured or suffered. This is where we really do need to avoid comparisons - when it comes to denying ourselves the right to our feelings, and even to our recovery, just because there is someone else whom we can see as having suffered more. How do you put a numerical value on someone's suffering after all?

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#162126 - 06/18/07 11:58 AM Re: Mom pimps 12 year old son [Re: roadrunner]
EGL Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 06/19/04
Posts: 7821
Originally Posted By: AJC
I sometimes find myself comparing and feeling stupid that I am so messed up by what happened to me compared to the more traumatic, horrific things that happened to others.

I know I shouldn't, but I do.


Andrew,

I talked to my T about this once, since I felt like I was just being a whiner for what happened to me compared to what happened to some others. I mean, it wasn't like I went through a horrific near death experience that we read about in the papers. So I was thinking "What do I have to whine about? I'm still alive."

But my T used a comparison to a burn victim for me. If a person gets horrible burns on both arms, then that hurts a lot. But if another person gets horrible burns on only one arm, that still hurts a lot, too. Yes, it's not as severe as having more burns over other parts of your body, but it's still a severe injury. It's the same with sexual abuse. While all our cases vary in degrees of severity, they all hurt. Our hurt is our pain, and we should not discount it.

_________________________
Eddie

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#162131 - 06/18/07 12:39 PM Re: Mom pimps 12 year old son [Re: WesQ]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Wes, and everyone,

Originally Posted By: WesQ
*sob* Why people do such cruel things to children, I have no clue.

I am glad that the boy sought out help from CYS and I hope he is protected now.

Ugh!


Actually, we have more than one teenager/young man here on the site who is struggling with exactly this problem. Every time we post and show our outrage at this terrible crime and our compassion for its victims it's like reaching out to those guys with a big safe hug. Imagine how that feels. Some of them don't know what a safe hug is.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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