You cant ride a closet full of shoes,
nor have much fun with makeup.
You forgot about her clothes, sunbed,
nails and hairdos.

Just L@@K wot we're missing,

ste

???

Trevor,

Becareful with your real father. I went through a similar situation with my biological father...he disappeared. i wanted to know why and what I found out when I talked to him, I wish I hadn't found out.

Just be prepared!

why? wat happened?

The things I found out where more detremental to my mental health than not knowing. What I feared was true and getting the confirmation hurt more than any amount of wondering.

Hauser,

Sometimes parents going their separate ways is much better for the kids than them staying together for years, for whatever reasons, and staying unhappy and fighting constantly.

It causes more trouble and trauma in the family than one parent being absent. As a child I so wanted my mother to just walk out one day, but she never did. May be she never had the courage or may be it was my own dreams. Though I fear the same each time they fought big time.

Today I know that they were both trapped in an ugly co-dependent relationship, which festered over the years, in which they regularly vented their anger, frustration and pain on us kids. In the end we were the main casualties of their marriage, they remained unhappy and angry anyways.

That way there is a better chance of happiness for someone, if they separate, as they are good people separately, they just make a lousy couple, that’s all. I wish they had move one and found better mates and some sort of happiness as well.

Otherwise they both stay unhappy together, only breed more unhappiness together. A switched off parents is worse than an absent one, at least in the later case you can consol yourself and start to build your life on your life...

Nevertheless, our parents did what they did, now its our turn to make best with the cards dealt to us, trying make them understand let alone feel guilt is not just exhausting but futile, because eventually it is our healing journey, not there's any more.

At some point in our life we have to let go of our dream of having a perfect - happy family, and not hold on to our grudges against our parents for being an unhappy or unsuccessful as a couple. It was not meant to be, so its alright to grieve, and then move on.

Love n Light
Morning Star

MS,

I completely agree, I was in the situation where staying together for my daughter was more detrimental. The parents think they are doing what is best, however they are truely being selfish!! It took me 4 years to realize I needed to get a divorce and damage was already done to my daughter, but not irreversible and probably not to the degree that it could have been.

I think as a kid of divorce, well I know, as a kid it was hard to understand why my parents split but now as an adult I truely see that was the best for my sister and I. As a kid I thought I wasn't wanted, it was my fault, but that is not true. If my parents had stayed together, what would have happenned??? Who knows but ya know what, there is nothing I can do to go back and change that. Yes it hurt when they split but hey thats life.

Trev,

Whatever you decide, prepare yourself for the consequences.

I wish you the best in making these choices and hope you will be able to get what you want.

if they stayed together then my drunk ass bitch
mother wouldnt have ended up with the fat ugly
fucking stepmonster an his kid then none of this
shit would have happened .
i would have rathr grew up w them
yelling n screaming at each othr all the
time then how i did
all i know is i hate them both
i cant decide who i hate more tho
him or her

Trevor,

But you have to enevtually look at the fact there is nothing you can do. We can't go back but just forcus on the now and the future. Going back can open up old wounds.

its not fair
why does he get have such a
great life and why do his
new kids get to have EVERYTHING
when i got nothing but shit!