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#147662 - 03/29/07 06:30 PM convicted sex offender joining church?
Ken Singer, LCSW Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/24/00
Posts: 5779
Loc: Lambertville, NJ USA
National Public Radio has a piece on a convicted sex offender attempting to join a church in California. This is happening around the country and there is training and advice for congregations considering allowing known sex offenders in.

" The Pilgrim United Church of Christ of Carlsbad, California, has a dilemma. A convicted child molester wants to join its congregation and the community has mixed reactions on whether or not it should open its arms to this black sheep."

The broadcast piece (about three minutes) will be available after 7:30 pm EDT at:

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=9213698

Ken Singer


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#147695 - 03/29/07 09:20 PM Re: convicted sex offender joining church? [Re: Ken Singer, LCSW]
James_dup1 Offline


Registered: 04/13/02
Posts: 1332
Loc: Wyoming
I can see how they would be torn as to what to do. One side says forgive everyone, but the human/parent side would say not in this life time.

_________________________
I have more issues than Rolling Stone!


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#147814 - 03/30/07 12:33 PM Re: convicted sex offender joining church? [Re: James_dup1]
FormerTexan Offline
Site Administrator
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 09/12/04
Posts: 11086
Loc: Denver, CO
Forgiveness is one thing. Trust is another.

_________________________
List of things ain't nobody got time for:

1. That


If I could meet myself as a boy...

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#147824 - 03/30/07 01:41 PM Re: convicted sex offender joining church? [Re: FormerTexan]
reality2k4 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 6838
Loc: Stuck between water, air, and ...
One has to wonder about the motive of this man and why he wants to join.
How many churchgoers abuse their own kids in secret?

As long as they know who he is, I cannot see why he should be rejected as that is Gods rule to forgive,

ste


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#147918 - 03/31/07 02:06 AM Re: convicted sex offender joining church? [Re: reality2k4]
Hauser Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/12/05
Posts: 2962
Loc: United States
What was his background/crime? If he was a 19yo that was caught by a willing 17yo girl's parents, that's totally different than some of the extreme horror stories that we've read here at MS. I guess I should just listen to the show instead of engaging in empty speculation though.


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#147957 - 03/31/07 10:13 AM Re: convicted sex offender joining church? [Re: Hauser]
FormerTexan Offline
Site Administrator
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 09/12/04
Posts: 11086
Loc: Denver, CO
Hauser,

It's horror story enough. I find it commendable that this man has gone forward to confess things before this church, so he isn't keeping anything secret. I didn't pick up from the newscast whether he was forced to disclose.

_________________________
List of things ain't nobody got time for:

1. That


If I could meet myself as a boy...

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#147972 - 03/31/07 11:03 AM Re: convicted sex offender joining church? [Re: FormerTexan]
shadowkid Offline
WARNING from ModTeam, September 2013: user "Shadowkid" was exposed as a hoaxer. His entire online persona and stories of sexual abuse were fiction. We encourage you not to become emotionally concerned by anything you see in any of his posts. Thank you
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/18/05
Posts: 2437
he should burst into flmes when he walks through the door ! but then god dont work that way does he? too bad

_________________________
its not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball - damien rice

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#148141 - 04/01/07 11:39 AM Re: convicted sex offender joining church? [Re: shadowkid]
lostandfound Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/01/07
Posts: 148
Loc: Singularity
One abused woman said that she escorted him because if she didn't that would give her abuser power over her. Bullsh*t!

He's a two time perp of little boys. My perp was a deacon. You can forgive, but God CANNOT HEAL those with no soul. This is an incurable disorder and he should never have been release from prison or the hospital. I can't accept allowing my son attend a church where a convicted sex offender is in attendance. To me that would be abusive to my son. No way. I won't do it.

I feel so angry about folks who want to accept this type of criminal. Churches are a haven for sexual abusers. It's just crininal.

-lost

_________________________
"I'm not suppose to be like this, but it's okay!" -REM

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#151236 - 04/16/07 10:27 PM Re: convicted sex offender joining church? [Re: lostandfound]
shadowkid Offline
WARNING from ModTeam, September 2013: user "Shadowkid" was exposed as a hoaxer. His entire online persona and stories of sexual abuse were fiction. We encourage you not to become emotionally concerned by anything you see in any of his posts. Thank you
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/18/05
Posts: 2437
i think there are two ways he could get in in. why not have him stand at the front door as each person came in, he would tell them his name address and his crime ,then apologize to each one ,also he should tell the age and sex of his victim or victims .if he would do that then let the people decide if he got in .or theres my way ,nailed to a cross and stood up at the front of the church.

_________________________
its not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball - damien rice

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#151278 - 04/17/07 08:34 AM Re: convicted sex offender joining church? [Re: shadowkid]
jamie' Offline
Guest

Registered: 03/09/07
Posts: 125
Loc: Ont, Can
That first suggestion by SK actully dosent sound like a bad idea. If he's really sorry and....reformed?, if thats possible. Then he should do something like that. Let him beg and put himself in a position of vaulnerability.

What i dont understand is his need for church. As they say god is everywhere.

_________________________
No matter how long and dark the night is, Or the fear and hurt that it can bring, there will always be a dawn, where we can push the past aside and move forward with hope.

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#151328 - 04/17/07 04:08 PM Re: convicted sex offender joining church? [Re: jamie']
Nobbynobs Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/26/05
Posts: 1286
Loc: Toronto
I think that Adam's first suggestion is exactly what the guy is doing. If he wants to join the congregation he will have to face them.

_________________________
When you go up to the bell, ring it! Or don't go up to the bell.

- Mel Brooks

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#151364 - 04/17/07 08:41 PM Re: convicted sex offender joining church? [Re: jamie']
Ken Singer, LCSW Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/24/00
Posts: 5779
Loc: Lambertville, NJ USA
There are a number of forms that the Universalist Church uses in its congregations at:
http://archive.uua.org/cde/ethics/balancing/appendices.html#limited]

See if that makes sense for you.
Ken


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#153139 - 04/27/07 11:26 PM Re: convicted sex offender joining church? [Re: jamie']
Daniel Peter Offline
Guest

Registered: 04/20/07
Posts: 40
Loc: Canada
Why did he have to say he was a perp before he went to mass? Can't a person just walk into any church, sit down and join the congregation? Is there another motive for his making this public?

_________________________
He who dies with the most toys...loses them all when he dies.

He who dies having fed and cared for his brother, wins in the eyes of God...and the hearts of his brothers.

He who dies but didn't ride...well...he didn't really live anyway!

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