11438 Members
70 Forums
58536 Topics
412401 Posts
Max Online: 418 @ 07/02/12 06:29 AM
|
|
|
#138837 - 01/24/07 09:04 AM
Why, Why, Why
|
BoD Liaison Emeritus MaleSurvivor<
Registered: 10/15/05
Posts: 3280
Loc: New Jersey
|
Why, Why, Why
Do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are going dead?
Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough money?
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?
Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver! at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "Lisp"?
If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?
How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?
When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right!
Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
And my FAVORITE......
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.
_________________________
If you fall down 10 times, Stand up 11.
|
|
Top
|
|
|
|
#138846 - 01/24/07 10:47 AM
Re: Why, Why, Why
[Re: Trish4850]
|
Member MaleSurvivor
Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 6834
Loc: Stuck between water, air, and ...
|
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try? That is what irks me, but not as much as opening a jar that has been vacuum sealed!!!! ste
|
|
Top
|
|
|
|
#138847 - 01/24/07 11:06 AM
Re: Why, Why, Why
[Re: reality2k4]
|
Member MaleSurvivor
Registered: 11/12/06
Posts: 527
Loc: Marlboro, MA 01752
|
My bubbles always have color You never heard the LISp man speak I ain't got no father-in-law How come Max the house dog here resembles Grimm and Mother Goose?
As for the others above, have no clue.
froggy
_________________________
??
|
|
Top
|
|
|
|
#138867 - 01/24/07 03:44 PM
Re: Why, Why, Why
[Re: froggy12]
|
Member MaleSurvivor
Registered: 12/24/06
Posts: 630
|
I guess people return to the refrigerator in the hope that something would have materialized in there because they watch alot of star trek.
Glue will not stick to the glass due to molecular charge etc....
The bubbles from a coloured bubble bath liquid are colourless just like snow is.
_________________________
you dont see me. i am not really here. Its my fault.. all of it. I am to blame and no one else.
|
|
Top
|
|
|
|
#138905 - 01/24/07 07:45 PM
Re: Why, Why, Why
[Re: Trish4850]
|
Moderator MaleSurvivor
Registered: 08/07/04
Posts: 3311
Loc: Northern Wisconsin
|
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.
Yep - always knew it was me...  Thanks for the laugh TJ jeff
_________________________
Who will cry for the little boy? - I will... - Antwone Fisher Abuse happens in silence/isolation - Recovery happens only when that silence/isolation is broken... TJ's History
|
|
Top
|
|
|
|
#138911 - 01/24/07 08:08 PM
Re: Why, Why, Why
[Re: TJ jeff]
|
Member MaleSurvivor
Registered: 08/30/05
Posts: 16259
|
Trish, I'm looking around here... ...Jeff's OK ...I'm OK ...Duncan's OK Sorry to break it, Sister, but it must be you!  Lots of love, Little Johnny
_________________________
“Life’s journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting ‘Holy ____…! What a ride!’” ~Hunter S. Thompson
|
|
Top
|
|
|
|
#138920 - 01/24/07 08:54 PM
Re: Why, Why, Why
[Re: WalkingSouth]
|
BoD Liaison Emeritus MaleSurvivor<
Registered: 10/15/05
Posts: 3280
Loc: New Jersey
|
John, I already knew that!  It's why so many people like to hang around me; I make them all feel good about themselves.  ROCK ON........Trish
_________________________
If you fall down 10 times, Stand up 11.
|
|
Top
|
|
|
|
#139010 - 01/25/07 04:03 PM
Re: Why, Why, Why
[Re: Trish4850]
|
Member MaleSurvivor
Registered: 12/24/06
Posts: 630
|
I dont think humans evolved from apes. the "dead" bugs are alive when they get in there. nothing is fool proof. unless they are zombies.
Tarzan is an actor, therefore can shave between films.
They can touch the paint but not the stars.
_________________________
you dont see me. i am not really here. Its my fault.. all of it. I am to blame and no one else.
|
|
Top
|
|
|
|
#139021 - 01/25/07 07:24 PM
Re: Why, Why, Why
[Re: Trish4850]
|
Member
Registered: 01/07/07
Posts: 167
Loc: Australia
|
I'm fine with nutcases, It's the other 3 I'm worry about.
_________________________
"It's your world Dave, I'm just livin' in it"
- Harvey Pekar to David Letterman (American Splendour)
|
|
Top
|
|
|
|
|