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#129575 - 10/29/04 10:40 PM Re: The old fashioned way ?
blacken Offline
Chatroom Moderator
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 08/13/01
Posts: 1264
Loc: Northern Ohio
Hey, if he was able to pull it off, great. But I would be dead today without counseling. Period.

_________________________
Everyone is a genius! If you were to judge a fish, by its ability to climb a tree,
it would think it was stupid all of it's life.
~Albert Einstein

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#129576 - 10/29/04 10:48 PM Re: The old fashioned way ?
Lloydy Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 04/17/02
Posts: 7071
Loc: England Shropshire
This is interesting, the feeling I get is that although so many of us do accept and use all the help we can, we still feel strongly that WE do the work, which is my feeling as well.

I think that because there are more sources of help we use them to EDUCATE ourselves rather than rely on them.
Yes, there are people who fall into the trap of thinking that just because they seek help they don't have to do anything for themselves. These people think that the healing will be done for them, just as they probably believe in Santa Claus ! But I do think it's a very small minority of Survivors, and not the type of Survivor we generally see at MS. If someone makes enough effort to come here then it's reasonable to say they're making an 'all-round' effort.

Quote:
I think your friend is trying to make a distinction where one doesn't exist, probably to prove he's tougher than other people.
Dan, I get this impression as well. And I know he does use many sources of 'private' help. But what he's done has worked, to a very large degree, for him. So he does have some claim to bragging rights.

I have huge admiration for his 'style', while still arguing with him strongly that we can't all do our healing in this 'go it alone' manner.
There's so much of what he does that I'd love to bottle and sell, but it's impossible to quantify. When we talk he tells me what he's done and the way he thinks, but it's beyond words.
Possibly the nearest I can get to it is to describe it as a 'fighting spirit'.
I know we all have it, but have we tapped into it as much as we could, or are we scared of unleashing our fighting spirit because we've kept it subdued for so long?

Dave

_________________________
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler.
Henry David Thoreau

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#129577 - 10/30/04 12:22 AM Re: The old fashioned way ?
Whicker Offline
Member

Registered: 11/01/03
Posts: 117
Loc: Pastures of Oregon
As for the 'Old Fashioned Way',

I have to wonder how many who held to the OFW killed themselves?
Abused alcohol?
Destroyed Family lives/life?
Ruined career(s)?
Lived a truly rotten existence, feeling alone and abaondoned by the society to which they belonged?

A believe 'Modern' methods and available resources are a Godsend, if One chooses to employ them.

Just my .02 worth.

Whicker

_________________________
Esse Quam Videri
(To be, rather than to seem)

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#129578 - 10/30/04 11:43 AM Re: The old fashioned way ?
reality2k4 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 6838
Loc: Stuck between water, air, and ...
Whicker, totally true what you say, but. We who had to do it the OFW, did it because nothing else was available to us at the time.

When it happenend to me 40yrs ago, there was nothing available, CSA, was treated like losing your bike! Or so it seemed to me as a kid.

Modern methods are a godsend, and I hope anyone in here who can benefit, surely take the steps needed to find this help.

The nearest help I can find is 40 miles away, costs $80+, per hour, I don't earn much. Catch 22 situation, but I really don't see anyhow, why we have to pay!

I really pray for those who didn't make it. Surely their souls will rest, because, as a kid, it really is hard to get past it. I for one nearly went through the exit.

ste

_________________________
Whoever stole the Sun, put it back and we'll drop all the charges!

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#129579 - 10/30/04 07:00 PM Re: The old fashioned way ?
Nealus Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 10/30/04
Posts: 17
Brayton,

I'm new here - as of today. I enjoyed your post and especially this one line:
"I can't think what else I would've done except died."

We are close in age. In our age group - we were told "Pick Yourself Up By Your BootStraps"

I couldn't.....and I honestly sometimes - don't know - how I have managed to survive all these years.

I do have some philosophies - and have learned philosophies - that helped me along the way - that I will share - as I get more acquainted with this forum.

Just wanted to let you know - that this newbie[to this board] - benefitted quit a bit from your writing.


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