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#128970 - 09/02/04 11:39 PM Man without a country
Leosha Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/18/03
Posts: 3614
Loc: Right here
I know two people here who probably will understand this some.

I was talking with friend earlier today, about the state of my country, the crime, the goverment troubles. There is so much sadness there. People in other parts of the world think it must be so much better, so much time removed from the evils of communism. It is not better. It is worse. It is less stable. There is crime, there is corruption, there is mafia and gangs. People are killed, people 'disappear', crimes remain unsolved, reports of crimes disappear as well.

The country I was born into, it does not exist. At all. The city I was born in, it is renamed. I come here from 'my country'. I don't have citizenship here. I am not a member of this country. I am 6 years removed from being a member of my own country. I feel more that this is 'home' to me. There is less there for me. Less opportunity for work and money, and more risk of being victim of crime and evil. My family still is there. That is all that is there for me. But my life, it is here now. But do I belong here also? I don't know.

We have to go there after next week. I don't want to. My friend is very afraid to go there. And it is not 'paranoid'. It is true fear, for real reasons. And the reports we filed, in March, I am sure they are gone. I am sure they have 'disappeared'. Better them then us I guess.

Just feeling quite outside of things right now I think. Not belonging. Not really in a bad way. Kind of in an indifferent way, but I guess not. Because indifferent would mean I am not bothered by it, right?

Not sure.

Leosha

_________________________
Avatar photo in memory of my younger brother Makar.

"Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted."~~~Martin Luther King Jr., 1963

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#128972 - 09/03/04 12:39 AM Re: Man without a country
brian-z Offline
Member

Registered: 07/11/02
Posts: 770
Loc: Western USA
What is an American?

Anyone who wants to be. This is a country of immigrants, the one thing we all have in common is our ancestors all came from some place else, some have just been here longer then others.


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#128973 - 09/03/04 02:49 AM Re: Man without a country
Leosha Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/18/03
Posts: 3614
Loc: Right here
Thank you both. Brian, I understand what you mean, about America and what the country is made up of, and based on. I am not sure why I am feeling so, well, off I guess. Maybe it is the trip back there next week that does it to me right now. Maybe it is all the traumas and terrorism going on there right now. I am not sure.

Leosha

_________________________
Avatar photo in memory of my younger brother Makar.

"Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted."~~~Martin Luther King Jr., 1963

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#128974 - 09/03/04 04:14 AM Re: Man without a country
Ivo Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/08/04
Posts: 267
Loc: Germany



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#128975 - 09/03/04 04:14 AM Re: Man without a country
Ivo Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/08/04
Posts: 267
Loc: Germany
Hello Leosha,
I am sad that your planned trip to old homeland brought you to such a mood.
Being born in a country that doesn't exist any more and, after everything crumbled, having cousins and old friends that are living in a lot of different countries I can say that I understand you.
I saw so many times that damn, so typically East European, sentimentality that we can not get rid of. I hope that situation would become better in future, both for you in US and for your old homeland.
Ivo


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#128976 - 09/03/04 06:17 AM Re: Man without a country
Leosha Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/18/03
Posts: 3614
Loc: Right here
Ivo,

You were one of the two people here that I KNEW would understand. It is sometime an unreal feeling, isn't it? ((((Ivo))))

For what it is worth, I hope that the reconstruction of your country is more peaceful and productive and positive then it's been in Russia so far. \:\(

Leosha

_________________________
Avatar photo in memory of my younger brother Makar.

"Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted."~~~Martin Luther King Jr., 1963

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#128977 - 09/03/04 06:50 AM Re: Man without a country
Ivo Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/08/04
Posts: 267
Loc: Germany
Yes,
Leosha it is very unreal. Do you have some telepathic powers \:\) ?
I guess with all difficulties in our lives it is still very unique and good experience just to be human being, isn't it?
Regarding my country and its transitional processes I am not sure that is at all in better position compared to Russia \:\( .

Ivo


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#128978 - 09/03/04 07:23 AM Re: Man without a country
reality2k4 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 6838
Loc: Stuck between water, air, and ...
Leosha,

I am deeply concerned of what is happening in Russia today, this latest incident is truly the work of evil. Nobody has the right to imprison, innocent children, and traumatise them, it is the work of evil minds. I do really hope, it comes to a peaceful ending.

The World itself is so unsafe, I guess we should be so thankful, that we don't have to share the pain and suffering that others have to face on a daily basis, don't think I could cope.

I wish you a life of peace, and not have to face the rigour of going back to a place, you once knew, as your own Country, I hope that the peoples' make a choice, to make the Country safe again, this is what we are all on Earth for, surely!

I wish you peace and harmony

ste

_________________________
Whoever stole the Sun, put it back and we'll drop all the charges!

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#128979 - 09/03/04 10:28 AM Re: Man without a country
Mike Church Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 01/23/03
Posts: 3439
Loc: Toronto, Canada
Leosha and Ivo and (Andrei) remeber the words of Brian. And Canada is even more so. I cannot begin to feel the pain of knowing my country is gone forever. In fact I think I am blessed. I am 1/8 North American Aboriginal. I used to say that is why I was a drunk and that hurt me more inside than anyone can imagine. The only difference between American and Canada is up here you have to learn to say EH and eath whale blubber and live in an igloo.

As i told a brother of mine over the phone yesterday in 40 years it will be your generation running your homeland. By then I hope that most of what is currently going on will be in the garbage pile of history.

_________________________
Mikey

IT REALLY IS OK TO STUMBLE. NONE OF US ARE PERFECT.

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#128980 - 09/03/04 01:46 PM Re: Man without a country
crisispoint Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/24/03
Posts: 2154
Loc: Massachusetts
Leshka,

I know I can't really understand what you're experiencing, but I also know what you're talking about.

When I was a young boy, your country was known (along with now-independant countries) as the U.S.S.R. We were brought up to be afraid of it. Not the people (we always tried to see a difference between the people of a country and the government), but what the government stood for. We were told that the politicians and the military were unthinking automatons, bent on destroying not only our way of life, but if it came to it, the world. We truly believed that the end of the world was possible, and that the Soviets would bring it about. Never "us," you know, always "them."

Today, we have no more enemy. Russia, with all its faults and renewed horrors, HAS been linked to the rest of the world. While the changes have been mostly negative, I have hope that there will be a march toward civility and civilization as it should be. Humankind has always let me down in that regard, but I still have hope. Now, we don't have one "Them." We have many. We, in the "free" world, no longer know who our enemies are. It was always the "Iron Curtain" when I was a child. Now? Who is the bogeyman? Well, it could be anyone. That frightens me more than haveing one single-faced "them."

I hate myself for thinking about THOSE days as "good." I also hate myself for thinking of "Them" as they enemy. "Them" is us. We are all human. We all know love, tenderness, compassion, charity. And we all know hate, callousness, contempt, selfishness.

I can't say I know what you feel, but my world has shifted on it's axis, and I see two choices.

We can keep the mentalities of the past, always fear each other, fear ourselves, think that nothing can never, WILL never, change, and just give up on the whole because the parts will always be rotten.

Or, we can see the mistakes we made, and work to change the world, a little at a time, one part at a time, one person at a time. We can lash out at the injustices, knowing we'll be at best ignored, or at worst considered a threat and "dealt with." We CAN make the world a better place, albeit slowly.

I can't speak for your fears, or that of your friend. They're certainly justified. And if it were my choice, Hell, I don't think I'd ever go back either. But you are making a difference. Here, there, everywhere, and I think it will be honored by a few. Those few will be enough.

If you want to join us, my friend, I will sponsor you, like Marc said. I'd sponsor anyone who wants to come here. I'd also support anyone who wants to make where they came from a better place, too.

Possibilities are endless. We just have to see that.

I love you, my friend.

Scot

_________________________
There are reasons I'm taking medication. They're called "other people." - Me, displaying my anti-social tendancies

fromacuriousmind.blogspot.com
malehurtandsurvive.blogspot.com

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#128981 - 09/03/04 08:56 PM Re: Man without a country
Lloydy Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 04/17/02
Posts: 7071
Loc: England Shropshire
Linda and I have watched in tears the horror of the school hostage situation in what was once the USSR.
The terror is unimaginable, and there's nothing in the world that justifies these actions.

It's possibly harder for us to deal with, we know the effects that childhood trauma can have.
My heart goes out to them all.

We live in difficult times, borders change, religions have taken on greater "importance" to many people, and old enemies are now our friends.
Our new enemies have suddenly become faceless.

It's tempting at times like this to withdraw and reject those from other cultures and religions, but we can't do that. I believe our best chance is to embrace others and accept their ways, and expect the same in return.

But on days such as this, it's mighty hard.

Dave

_________________________
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler.
Henry David Thoreau

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#128982 - 09/03/04 10:06 PM Re: Man without a country
outis Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/27/03
Posts: 2260
Loc: Maryland USA
Leosha,

I obviously have not lived through the dissolution of the country where I was born. Still, I do not think of you as man without a country.
Quote:
But my life, it is here now. But do I belong here also?
I think you answer your own question.

We are all only human. Countries, patriotism, ethnic pride, religions, all the rest of the things, even languages (it is common that a language has one word for those who speak it, and another for those who do not), that humans use to separate ourselves never really change us. We are still human.

Many long forgotten empires and kingdoms have risen and fallen. Who struck fear in all their enemies' hearts in what is now Bolivia 3000 years ago? Whose ruled on the steppes then? In what is now Maryland? Who were the great teachers and poets of Inuit lands while the pyramids were being built on the other side of the world?

All these civilizations have disappeared without even an echo in history. The people born into them lived their lives with them, and some of those people saw the ends of their worlds, too.

They made their lives where and when they found themselves in the context of the people around them. Whether speaking some language lost millenia ago, or speaking English in the US of A today, people make their lives with their loves and friendships.

Thanks,

Joe

_________________________
"Telemachos, your guest is no discredit to you. I wasted no time in stringing the bow, and I did not miss the mark. My strength is yet unbroken…"—The Odyssey, translated by W.H.D. Rouse

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