I have felt disjointed since the knowledge of my incest came to me over 40 years after the fact. I know it is not an implanted memory--too many pieces fit together. It has helped me understand all the totally insane things I did, but my heart has broken. I know I will be all right, but I go through periods of wanting to run away, which is what I did repetitively when I was a young man. VAC

Vac,

Welcome to the site. I'm glad you found us and I hope you will take advantage of the many things this place has to offer. Just do so at your own pace and you'll be fine.

I feel for the heartbreak you speak of; I can imagine it must be terrible right now as you try to process this information. I can understand that feeling that you need to run away, and you are right; that's a feeling coming up from childhood.

We are all different, of course, but I myself find it helps a lot to talk about these things. That helps to rob them of their power over us.

That's good you have confidence in your recovery, but please don't dismiss what happened to you or think you will just "get over it". Genuine recovery requires that we face our issues and pain, difficult though that may be. All of us are here trying to do that, and to support each other along the way. Please do join us.

Much love,
Larry

Welcome Vac. Glad you've found us, and that you've taken this courageous step in beginning to talk about it. Like Larry says, talking helps to rob the memories of their power to hurt. I would only add that sometimes it can hurt a lot worse before it starts to get better.

So many of us here have experienced exactly that, and we've made it through to the shallow water on the other side. You can too, and we're here to help you out in any way we can. Just keep talking as you go and take small steps. We've got your back.

Lots of love,

John