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#125030 - 08/13/03 07:56 AM Happy Birthday, Danny
outis Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/27/03
Posts: 2260
Loc: Maryland USA
Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday, dear Danny,
Happy birthday to you!

What'd you wish for? \:\)

_________________________
"Telemachos, your guest is no discredit to you. I wasted no time in stringing the bow, and I did not miss the mark. My strength is yet unbroken…"—The Odyssey, translated by W.H.D. Rouse

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#125031 - 08/13/03 08:12 AM Re: Happy Birthday, Danny
Mike Church Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 01/23/03
Posts: 3439
Loc: Toronto, Canada
Yeh Danny what did you wish for. Give us some good stuff.

Does this mean that we can give you 40 bounces when me meet sometime.

I know that this a future years will be filled with happiness for you.

Happy birthday Hug (((((((((((((((DANNY)))))))))

_________________________
Mikey

IT REALLY IS OK TO STUMBLE. NONE OF US ARE PERFECT.

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#125032 - 08/13/03 09:57 AM Re: Happy Birthday, Danny
Sans Logos Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/31/03
Posts: 5791
Loc: in my own world in pittsburgh,...
Ditto Danny. I look forward to growing old along with you.

\:D

Cheesy, I know, but what other kind of sentiments are most sincerely and apporpriately expressed at hallmark times like these?

Ron

_________________________
  1. the past
  2. ReClaiming Now
  3. advocacy


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#125033 - 08/14/03 12:37 AM Re: Happy Birthday, Danny
ScottyTodd Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 02/12/03
Posts: 1561
Loc: Pennsylvania
Hey Danny, that's me lookin' in the window over there on the left...see me? Just wishin' you the very happiest of birthdays! I'd sing that song, you know the one, but with my voice I hate to see a grown man cry!!

Howard

_________________________
If you think you can or you can't - you're right!.......anon
It's never too late to have a happy childhood!.....anon
You're very normal for the abnormal situation you've been through..............S. Todd

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#125034 - 08/14/03 06:36 AM Re: Happy Birthday, Danny
michael Joseph Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/11/01
Posts: 2719
Loc: Virginia
happy birthday to you danny

hope you are doing well

michael

_________________________
Standing together is so much better than hiding in the dark.
***I am a three time WoR Retreat Alumni***
The Round Table, Men's CSA Group, Monday 7:30pm CST, MaleSurvivor Chat

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#125035 - 08/16/03 12:03 AM Re: Happy Birthday, Danny
dwf Offline
Moderator/BoD Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/24/03
Posts: 1223
Loc: Austin, Texas USA
Thanks, Joe and everyone for all the good wishes.

I'm 49 now, and I think I'm operating at about 49% brain function too!

I've been MIA for the last several days.....getting all caught up in the house buying, relationship building frenzy. It's driving me fucking nuts.

I want the house already finished and the relationship fully developed and neither one of them have been around long enough for that to happen.

I'm kind of amazed by how much stress is being released by both of these experiences.

I've always had tremedous anxiety about a safe place to stay, a place of my own. Now that I've finally bought my own place, all those old fears are not magically vanishing. Instead they are popping their ugly heads up and sticking their tongues out at me.

I've dreamed for a long time of finding someone who was kind and understanding to work and build a relationship with. Now that I've found someone like that I find that the ghosts of the past and the sexual abuse still come back to haunt me.

Now all of sudden, instead of me being able to blame everything on the perpertrator, I find that I am exhibiting some pretty weird sexual behavior on occasion with my new friend.

I know that my behavior was learned from the sexual abuser, but it still feels like shit when I found myself getting into that old behavior with this guy that I care about so much.

It really makes all the feelings of shame come up.
They are so strong that I can't ignore them. I have to acknowledge them and also have been forced to discuss them with my partner. It's really hard to do, even though I know it's the best thing to do.

I reamarked to a friend of mine that I hated that these old feelings and patterns keep coming up when I'm in the middle of building my new life.
He responded that perhaps the reason that they are coming up now is because this is the moment when they can be healed.

I hope so. Becuase loving someone and letting them get close hurts more than I thought it would. I guess some of those parts of me are still so tender. You know I'm really enjoying so much of all of this new stuff, new people, new experiences. And the rest of it is really scary, and really hard.

Life is richer and fuller than ever before, thanks in part to my ongoing recovery from the sexual abuse. It is more complex and more fulfilling. I wouldn't trade it for what I had before, but it still is hard some days to stop the tears from flowing.

I've been emotionally on a roller coaster.

It's great to have all the love and support that the guys of MS give me.

Thanks for all the things you say and do to make my life possible.

I'm going to try to be more involved in the moment. And stop projecting into the future. And stop reliving the past. That's would be a good wish for this birthday don't you think?

Your brother,

_________________________
"Poke salad Annie, 'gators got you granny
Everybody said it was a shame
'Cause her mama was aworkin' on the chain-gang"

-Tony Joe White

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#125036 - 08/16/03 10:01 AM Re: Happy Birthday, Danny
Mike Church Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 01/23/03
Posts: 3439
Loc: Toronto, Canada
Danny

Quote:
I reamarked to a friend of mine that I hated that these old feelings and patterns keep coming up when I'm in the middle of building my new life.
He responded that perhaps the reason that they are coming up now is because this is the moment when they can be healed.
I think he has it right Danny and it is good that you can talk to your partner about them. Keep it up young man \:D
Your old brother :p

_________________________
Mikey

IT REALLY IS OK TO STUMBLE. NONE OF US ARE PERFECT.

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#125037 - 08/16/03 09:57 PM Re: Happy Birthday, Danny
guy43 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/17/02
Posts: 450
Loc: Minnesota
HB Dannyo,

One Day at a time lad. Enjoy the day and don't take things so darn rootin' tootin' seriously !

\:\)

Jer


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