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#124694 - 06/19/03 09:43 AM Re: Hi
guy43 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/17/02
Posts: 450
Loc: Minnesota
Orodo,

so sorry for what you're going through. it'll get better, it really will. ask for answers to your problems and they will reveal themselves.

a gentle nudge too... give up the bottle my friend, it will only make things worse. alcohol and meds don't mix well, it clouds your judgement and distorts your feelings - making things seem far bleaker then they are.

lylab,

jer


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#124695 - 06/19/03 12:25 PM Re: Hi
Thad Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/28/01
Posts: 1752
Loc: Oakland, CA
Marc,

(((((((((((Marc)))))))))))
(((((((((((Marc)))))))))))
(((((((((((Marc)))))))))))

I so much know what you are going through with your ex - get as much help as you can - early on I had several friends (which I called my support team) that I would check with before I made any response to anything my ex had to say or did - totally did not rely on my own emotions to do anything with her relating to the co-parenting that we continued to have to do -

I eventually learned to set good boundaries with her which included saying "I don't think this conversation is healthy or supports our children - I need to go - perhaps we can talk later" - 'click' -

The hardest part was the negative crap she dumped on the kids - all I could say to them was "well, that is where your mother is at - This is not about you nor is any of it your fault - it is a problem your parents have - I'm sorry it is so upsetting for you - just know that your mother really does love you and so do I - I will always be your father and I will always love you." - I never put her down in front of the kids - ever (It is a gift I gave to my kids) These are>
_________________________
"..this place isn't a discussion forum..it's a portal..." Lupin
"The truth will set you free, but first it will probably piss you off." dwf's AA sponsor.

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#124696 - 06/19/03 09:23 PM Re: Hi
Ken Followell Offline
President
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 12/30/01
Posts: 990
Loc: Bradenton, FL
(((((((Marc)))))))

You are in my thoughts often. I wish i could help you bear the pain of your life right now. Remember YOU ARE A GOOD MAN. It may be hard to know that , but we here do.

LYLAB

Ken

_________________________
Ken Followell

Everything works out right in the end. If things are not working right, it isn't the end yet. Don't let it bother you, relax and keep on goin
- Michael C. Muhammad

"I get up. I walk. I fall down. Meanwhile, I keep dancing."
� Rabbi Hillel

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#124697 - 06/19/03 09:48 PM Re: Hi
Cement Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/05/02
Posts: 740
Loc: Southern California
You are a good man, a good dude, and you are heading in a positive direction, even if it doesn't appear that way.

big safe hugs...

LYLAB
Jamie

ahhhhwoooooooooooooo (a little plaintive howl, cuz I am feeling your sadness)

_________________________
And let the darkness fear our light.

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#124698 - 06/20/03 05:51 AM Re: Hi
ernie Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/26/02
Posts: 121
Loc: Portland, Maine
Marc, take care of Marc. You are a good man, and all of us support you in your journey. Its not easy don't be afraid to ask for help.

Bob

_________________________
The roads of life are full of stones but, they can be moved take my hand we will help each other.

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#124699 - 06/20/03 09:36 AM Re: Hi
orodo Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/15/02
Posts: 735
Loc: Imladris, The Safe Haven of Ar...
thanks guys. I needed to hear all of what you say. I am very fortunate to have found this place and so many good friends. I have learned that I survived much worse than this. I will get through this. For me and for my boys.

LYLAB

_________________________
It is better to be Dragon Master than Dragon Slayer. Some Dragons are meant to be mastered, others meant to be slain. Odin, Great Spirit, God, grant me the wisdom to know the difference. "May the Valar guide and bless you on your path under the sky"

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#124700 - 07/14/03 11:08 PM Re: Hi
orodo Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/15/02
Posts: 735
Loc: Imladris, The Safe Haven of Ar...
it still hurts...alot. I am feeling very very disappointed with myself, ashamed, alone, worthless, and so much more.

I recently found out where my priest perp is working part-time, and guess what, I decided to stop by the local convenience store for some smokes. He was working. Ended up drinking myself into a stupor two nites in a row. Praise Odin that I had a good friend taking care of me. He knows who he is. I met him here. Thank you brother. You saved me from myself.

The alone part hurts the most. I can't stand being alone. Living with Mom and Dad is ok, but I am such an inconvenience. When, how, where, will this ever end. Does it ever end? Why won't it stop. What did I ever do to anyone to deserve this?

Sorry to ramble, but i just had to vent something, somewhere. thanks for listening, being my Brothers, lylab...

_________________________
It is better to be Dragon Master than Dragon Slayer. Some Dragons are meant to be mastered, others meant to be slain. Odin, Great Spirit, God, grant me the wisdom to know the difference. "May the Valar guide and bless you on your path under the sky"

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#124701 - 07/14/03 11:31 PM Re: Hi
outis Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/27/03
Posts: 2260
Loc: Maryland USA
Marc,

You're not completely alone, as long as you come back here to vent to us. I know it's not the same, but it's also not really alone, either.

This too shall pass. You will come out of it. You didn't do anything to deserve it.

If you get a chance, take a look at some of the older posts around here. I looked back at some today, not even back to 2002. You'll see that you needn't feel worthless, or ashamed, etc. You're a worthy person who's done a lot to help guys in pain. You made the world a better place, and eventually that better place will get back to you.

Go easy on yourself,

Joe

_________________________
"Telemachos, your guest is no discredit to you. I wasted no time in stringing the bow, and I did not miss the mark. My strength is yet unbroken…"—The Odyssey, translated by W.H.D. Rouse

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#124702 - 07/15/03 05:35 PM Re: Hi
Lloydy Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 04/17/02
Posts: 7071
Loc: England Shropshire
Marc
I'm glad you've come back here for some support and help, and don't look upon it as a step backwards just because you've been there, done that, sometime before.
I bet you haven't forgotten a thing, just been derailed.

Look upon it as just another day at MS, one where you help us and we help you.

Dave

_________________________
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler.
Henry David Thoreau

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#124703 - 07/15/03 06:15 PM Re: Hi
Cement Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/05/02
Posts: 740
Loc: Southern California
you are not alone...

Peace,
James

_________________________
And let the darkness fear our light.

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