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#123345 - 02/19/05 04:29 PM Re: Need some advice on what Therapist has said
Logan Offline

Registered: 04/05/03
Posts: 1266
Loc: NY
BTW, Where is the "Find a T" part of this web page?
i'm gonna be moving cross the country soon.
Thanx for the help

"Terrible thing to live in Fear"-Shawshank Redemption
WOR Alumnus Hope Springs 2009
"Quite a thing to live in fear, this is what is means to be a slave"
-Blade Runner

#123346 - 02/19/05 05:32 PM Re: Need some advice on what Therapist has said
James_dup1 Offline

Registered: 04/13/02
Posts: 1332
Loc: Wyoming
I have more issues than Rolling Stone!

#123347 - 02/28/05 04:49 AM Re: Need some advice on what Therapist has said
Ken Singer, LCSW Offline
Moderator Emeritus

Registered: 08/24/00
Posts: 5781
Loc: Lyons, CO USA
The gender decision can be difficult. What I usually tell the child victims I see is, "Come to see me three times and YOU decide whether you want to come back, but keep an open mind."

This makes a short term commitment with an end in sight. If the therapist can "hook" the child in three visits, the therapy can have a chance. If the child decides he doesn't want to come back, he is not being forced to do something he doesn't want to do.

Another thing to consider, if he believes in Jesus being a good person, was not Jesus a man? Is his father not a man? Not all men are bad.

It's important that he understand that some problems can't be solved by Mom and Dad. You need to have a professional take care of it sometimes.

I don't like forcing kids to be in therapy when they've been abused. It can feel like further victimization when they don't want to. On the other hand, kids don't want to go to the dentist or get shots from the doctor. Sometimes, you have to just do it because it is for your own good. Try the three visit agreement and see if that works, if you can't find a female therapist for him.

Blissfully retired after 35 years treating sexual abuse

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