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#115493 - 09/18/02 11:49 AM Re: Looking for Florida group
bocacdc Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 11/16/01
Posts: 1
Loc: South Florida
I'm in Southeast Florida and haven't been able to find a support group for male survivors of sexual abuse as adults. Yes, there may be groups for those who were victimized as children. But those males who have been victimized as adults don't have the same resources as female victims.
Steve


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#115494 - 10/27/02 11:26 PM Re: Looking for Florida group
Ken Followell Offline
President
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 12/30/01
Posts: 990
Loc: Bradenton, FL
I hae found a group. It meets at Manatee Glens in Bradenton. I am checking into it further but thought I would post the info here.

_________________________
Ken Followell

Everything works out right in the end. If things are not working right, it isn't the end yet. Don't let it bother you, relax and keep on goin
- Michael C. Muhammad

"I get up. I walk. I fall down. Meanwhile, I keep dancing."
� Rabbi Hillel

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#115495 - 11/05/02 11:55 PM Re: Looking for Florida group
Ken Followell Offline
President
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 12/30/01
Posts: 990
Loc: Bradenton, FL
The group that meets at Manatee Glens is therapist lead and meets on Mondays at 3pm. You need to meet with a therapist prior to meeting with the group to be sure i would be appropriate for you to participate with the group. There is no charge for particiapation. I will be meeting with the group next Monday for my first time.

_________________________
Ken Followell

Everything works out right in the end. If things are not working right, it isn't the end yet. Don't let it bother you, relax and keep on goin
- Michael C. Muhammad

"I get up. I walk. I fall down. Meanwhile, I keep dancing."
� Rabbi Hillel

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#115496 - 11/12/02 01:55 PM Re: Looking for Florida group
Ken Followell Offline
President
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 12/30/01
Posts: 990
Loc: Bradenton, FL
I went to the group meeting yesterday at Manatee Glens in Bradenton FL. the other members tht were meeting have all moved on for various reasons. So right now the group is myself and the therapist. If anyone is interested in joining, they should contact David Hinckle at Manatee Glens 941-747-3131. He seems to be a good therapsit from our first meeting and I look forward to other men joining the group.

_________________________
Ken Followell

Everything works out right in the end. If things are not working right, it isn't the end yet. Don't let it bother you, relax and keep on goin
- Michael C. Muhammad

"I get up. I walk. I fall down. Meanwhile, I keep dancing."
� Rabbi Hillel

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#115497 - 09/13/03 12:45 PM Re: Looking for Florida group
Ken Followell Offline
President
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 12/30/01
Posts: 990
Loc: Bradenton, FL
I am meeting with two other survivors today to discuss starting a group. Over six months of a free ad in the newspaper. Three calls from survivors and finally we will be able to meet. The first group just wasn't what I wanted, the therapist was more interested in teaching meditation than dealing with our issues. Hopefully this will be the start of a good thing.

_________________________
Ken Followell

Everything works out right in the end. If things are not working right, it isn't the end yet. Don't let it bother you, relax and keep on goin
- Michael C. Muhammad

"I get up. I walk. I fall down. Meanwhile, I keep dancing."
� Rabbi Hillel

Top
#115498 - 09/22/03 12:23 AM Re: Looking for Florida group
Ken Followell Offline
President
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 12/30/01
Posts: 990
Loc: Bradenton, FL
The group is now officially started. We will meet every 2 weeks on Saturday mornings at 10:00. We are currently meeting at my home. The next meeting will be October 4, 2003. If anyone is within driving distance of Bradenton, I would be happy to give you directions. If you cannot be wth us physically, please keep us in your thoughts.

_________________________
Ken Followell

Everything works out right in the end. If things are not working right, it isn't the end yet. Don't let it bother you, relax and keep on goin
- Michael C. Muhammad

"I get up. I walk. I fall down. Meanwhile, I keep dancing."
� Rabbi Hillel

Top
#115499 - 10/22/03 12:37 AM Re: Looking for Florida group
Ken Followell Offline
President
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 12/30/01
Posts: 990
Loc: Bradenton, FL
This is the test of a brochure I have written for my men's group.


Mens Sexual Abuse Survivors Support Meeting


1 in 6 men have survived sexual abuse at some time in their life.

Have you ever felt like you are the only one this has ever happened to?
As boys growing up, we have been told many lies about life. One lie is that men/boys cannot be raped or otherwise sexually abused. That is not true. Boys and men have been and continue to be the un-acknowledged victims of many types of sexual abuse.
Boys have survived abuse at the hands of parents (both Mothers and Fathers), relatives, siblings, neighbors, clergy and strangers. Early sexual experiences do not make a boy lucky; they can cause lasting feelings of being used and make adult intimacy difficult. Men can be and have been raped by both men and women.
You are not alone.
You are not to blame.



COMMON LASTING EFFECTS OF SEXUAL ABUSE:
Addiction to drugs or alcohol
Anxiety
Depression
Dissociation
Fear
Gender Confusion
Helplessness
Homophobia
Hostility and anger
Impaired relationships
Isolation and Alienation
Low self-esteem
Masculinity Issues
Negative Childhood Peer Relations
Self Blame / Guilt
Sexual dysfunction
Sexual orientation confusion
Shame / Humiliation
Sleep disturbance
Suicidal ideas and behavior
Although this is an extensive list it is by no means exhaustive. Many men can recognize the symptoms before allowing themselves to remember the actual abuse. Lost memories of portions of their childhood are common to survivors.
WHAT WE DO
We meet every other Saturday morning to offer encouragement and support as fellow survivors of sexual abuse. We discuss dealing with the effects and discuss ways to heal and move forward in our lives.
We provide a place where it is safe for survivors to tell the story of the abuse if desired. It is helpful to be heard by others who know what you are saying is true, no matter how much society wants to deny it. It is not our desire to merely rehash our experiences, but by being heard we can leave the past behind us and work on a future.
Most survivors do not become perpetrators of abuse themselves. This group is for non-offending survivors. If you are a survivor and are abusing others we urge you to find appropriate help. This group would not be appropriate for you.


HOW DO I COME TO A MEETING?

It is our desire that each meeting be a place where we feel safe to share what we want and speak freely. We are currently meeting in survivors homes with men who have contacted us prior to coming to a meeting.
This is purely a peer support group and is not facilitated by a therapist. We do talk with men before they come to a meeting to let them know what to expect and then give them the location of the meeting. We ask that all members of the group respect the privacy of each member and not repeat what is discussed nor disclose who is attending.
You may call the member(s) listed on the back of the brochure to discuss if it would be appropriate for you to come to a meeting and to learn the location and date of the next meeting.
We meet every other Saturday at 10 a.m. till noon.

_________________________
Ken Followell

Everything works out right in the end. If things are not working right, it isn't the end yet. Don't let it bother you, relax and keep on goin
- Michael C. Muhammad

"I get up. I walk. I fall down. Meanwhile, I keep dancing."
� Rabbi Hillel

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#115500 - 10/22/03 07:02 AM Re: Looking for Florida group
Ivanhoe Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/19/03
Posts: 1907
Ken,

What perseverence. And you made it happen!!

If I were to offer a suggestion, it would be to try and get a therapist who could really guide you and offer you some protection, as well.

I don' mean to throw a wet blanket on the great work that you've done to get your group started, I just think that when a professional is involved there are more benefts and less risk of something negative tainting your efforts.

What I'm suggesting is that you PM Ken Singer to see if he has any contacts in your area, or if he's willing to develop one or two contacts to help you find a qualified group therapist.

Until then, and if a therapist can not be found, good luck to you and the others as you seek a way through this somtimes quagmire, called therapy and support.

You have my profoundest admiration,

David

_________________________
"No soul is desolate as long as there is a human being for whom it can feel trust and reverence."
George Eliot

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#115501 - 10/22/03 11:09 AM Re: Looking for Florida group
Joey G. Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/22/03
Posts: 28
Loc: FL
Hi Ken, and you others. I just joined this board today and I'd be very interested in some kind of group or meeting. I'm in the Tampa area.


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#115502 - 10/27/03 12:09 AM Re: Looking for Florida group
Ken Followell Offline
President
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 12/30/01
Posts: 990
Loc: Bradenton, FL
David,

Thanks or your suggestion, and a therapist would be great. But I have spent years searcing the resources in this area and they jut do not exist. So off I go into new territory. I do have contacts willing to support me from a distance, so I will rely on that. And of course I have the good thoughts from my brothers here on the site.

Ken

_________________________
Ken Followell

Everything works out right in the end. If things are not working right, it isn't the end yet. Don't let it bother you, relax and keep on goin
- Michael C. Muhammad

"I get up. I walk. I fall down. Meanwhile, I keep dancing."
� Rabbi Hillel

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