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Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Happy to be abused? by Tryingtolive @ 07/31/15 04:54 PM

To be honest ... I question my abuse if it was really abusive all the time ... I mean I did enjoy it ... My abuse is so complicated if you look at my story would see ... The problems I have today I like to push the blame on the abuse cause it's so e
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Happy to be abused? by Sven @ 07/31/15 04:53 PM

Perhaps he can't see it as 'sexual abuse' because a lot of people have clear black/white ideas about what that is. And this doesn't fit the picture because there were no threats or physical abuse involved. Plus excepting that it is abuse would mean a
Off Topic
Jump to new posts Re: free association & freedom of expression by Sterling @ 07/31/15 04:08 PM

I see a guy today at a grocery store. He came over. I just wanted so. to . see my dad. but. instead I see dick. and I see my body as a woman. I am so fucked. I needed that dad shit. and I don't know. I worry if I will give a guy a bl
Off Topic
Jump to new posts Re: free association & freedom of expression by victor-victim @ 07/31/15 03:02 PM

just BE.
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Shedding the "weight" of secrecy and shame by DavidM-LT @ 07/31/15 02:40 PM

Eirik, Your story, your abuse story, is also inspiring. I read the book "Victims no longer" by Mike Lew. He mentions frequently the courage that these little boys had to do what many adults couldn't even dream of. Your story certainly prov
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Shedding the "weight" of secrecy and shame by DavidM-LT @ 07/31/15 02:35 PM

Kevin, I'd like to say that I'm sorry for those horrible first experiences you had in telling your story. It's what I feared the most the first time I told it. Especially because of who I told it to. I've only told it a few more times and have been
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Inspiration Just for today by victor-victim @ 07/31/15 02:00 PM

We are going to die, and that makes us the lucky ones. Most people are never going to die because they are never going to be born. Richard Dawkins
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Why Would Anyone Say A Victim is a Liar by KMCINVA @ 07/31/15 01:43 PM

Paul very good question. Victor great response. I learned from a wise person people are ignorant because they fail to update their knowledge when presented with new facts, they hold onto the old. I have witnessed this with trauma, medical profession
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Shedding the "weight" of secrecy and shame by Suwanee @ 07/31/15 11:33 AM

Highlight, Like Eirik, I identify very strongly with your experience and "weight" analogy. As I've conveyed to you before, I recognize many similarities to my own experience-then and now. I spent time and energy over the years climbing hig
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Happy to be abused? by Chase Eric @ 07/31/15 10:12 AM

Thanks, Mike - I suppose I should clarify something, though - because there exists a dynamic in which some see a younger male's sexual involvement with a pretty female teacher as more of a conquest than abuse, a perspective I believe is egregiously
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Happy to be abused? by Nothing Man @ 07/31/15 10:04 AM

Hi Eirik. Thank you for a thought-provoking post. My own opinion is that sexual activity between children and adults is wrong, regardless of the circumstances. I wonder if your friend actually seduced the teacher or if the teacher manipulated him
Introductions
Jump to new posts Re: Car park by KMCINVA @ 07/31/15 10:03 AM

Strive I am so sorry for what happened to you. I am glad you are here and letting it out. It is important you have support because the memories can be overwhelming. Do you have a therapist or doctor that is helping you? Remember we understand wh
Introductions
Jump to new posts Re: Car park by Nothing Man @ 07/31/15 09:48 AM

Hello Strive, and welcome -- even while I am so sorry for the reason you are here. What was done to you was horrible and unforgivable and you have every right to be angry over what was done to you. Just don't direct that anger at yourself, because
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Happy to be abused - or was it abuse at all? by Chase Eric @ 07/31/15 09:09 AM

So I was talking with an old friend last night. We are conversing about sexual abuse issues, since I told him that I was doing a project on that topic. And he tells me very casually that at sixteen, he seduced one of his school teachers. The teach
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: I have to ask something by dark empathy @ 07/31/15 09:08 AM

"Diseased" for me is one of my trigger words. I was told "your fucking diseased" every day as a teenager, often while undergoing humiliation or violence, and I've said before how absolutely painful it is that that! is my most int
Gay/Bi/Trans Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: It gets better (Apple employees) by lapchinj @ 07/31/15 09:03 AM

Hey ig3 That was a very good video and it does help with my own suicide demons. It's not just that I'm gay that I wish I was dead but I just wonder how much of my past was caused by me being gay. Thanks for the post Peace, Rainbows, Love, Healing
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Candle by bluesky @ 07/31/15 09:01 AM

Thanks for posting this I used to do something like this and I think I will start to do it agin it did help. It helped bring more mindful awareness in to my life.
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Sense of smell by KMCINVA @ 07/31/15 08:55 AM

When I began to unravel and heal I had one smell I could not take, coffee. At that time I drank a few cups of coffee a day. For some reason I would feel nausea if I had coffee--I did not know why. I talked about it and it is possible the abuser was
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Sense of smell by bluesky @ 07/31/15 08:49 AM

When I stared my recovery I had a heightened sense of smell. Could not be around people except for my wife they all smelled bad. My T said that it called a hyper vigilante state like all my senses were on alert. The other thing is I can not be around
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts CSA Site National Association of Adult Survivors by KMCINVA @ 07/31/15 08:42 AM

I was introduced to this site recently by a sibling of a victim who did not ultimately survive. I had met this person years ago when living elsewhere and we connected through one of the sites. Somehow two and two were put together. I wanted to share
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Sense of smell by dark empathy @ 07/31/15 08:40 AM

Not sure what you mean by intermitant, sinse it sounds like if you can smell things sometimes and not others either there is something wrong like a cold or your not processing information constantly or similar, if however smell is triggering, or is w
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Shedding the "weight" of secrecy and shame by Chase Eric @ 07/31/15 08:36 AM

Well it would be a bit of understatement to say that I relate well to what you are saying, and not an overstatement to say that you have told much of my own story. This is an open forum, and a lot of people come here sometimes just to understand wha
Gay/Bi/Trans Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: DAD/SON Incest Sexual Fetish by Strive 38/11 @ 07/31/15 07:24 AM

Yes if the dad is committed to making his son well
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Signs of boy by Strive 38/11 @ 07/31/15 06:27 AM

What things, how does your boy inside you project himself outwardly in your demmeana in your projection, how you greet, converse and respond. Can you keep him safe when outside. I know I'm my boy is vulnerable to social engagement. Is there anyth
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Beat Sex by Strive 38/11 @ 07/31/15 06:06 AM

Surely the perplexity of the child still present as the body grows older, the hands look more wrinkly. It's a state flux of control verse abandoning self to risk. That's addictive in itself. A partner and monogamy dreams. Great you have that Vic
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