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Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: first setback with my wife by learning2remember @ 12/16/14 03:19 AM

Not talking about it with my wife has worked pretty well for us. I let her know the issues, so it's not that I feel like I've kept a secret. Beyond that, she doesn't pry, and I don't disclose. Things I consider in therapy do come out in how we relat
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Love? by learning2remember @ 12/16/14 03:13 AM

I can't even read all of these responses right now. There is a lot of heavy stuff here. Even the idea of imagining the three different ways to respond scares me. I know I was passive, but I have a hard time imaginingr anything else. In my case, I, t
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: I've been going to Therapy. by learning2remember @ 12/16/14 03:01 AM

Thanks for the update, carperson. Every sign of progress is a good thing, including the ability to recognise progress. When you say you don't talk much about the abuse with anyone and that that seems ok, I would just say that it IS ok. Talking abou
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts I've been going to Therapy. by carperson @ 12/16/14 12:21 AM

I have been going to therapy. It's been getting better. I feel in control and as if I can take life. I recently came back and looked over the sight and re-read my old posts. I thought I would up date and talk about my life. My brother and I went to
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: how to approach the sibling by carperson @ 12/16/14 12:02 AM

I know how you feel. I have never told my sibling much and I don't know if I can. I am afraid that he will judge me or be hurt. My sibling was also abused, but I guess it's the guilt. But, I do feel that you do feel you need to talk. I guess I don't
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Delusional or Disassociation fears by kcinohio @ 12/15/14 11:42 PM

Some good suggestions so far. Also found that dissociation responds well to therapy. There were some rather extended dream-like times during one part of my journey around it, but the only way out was through at some points, not "snapping out of
Sexual Abuse/Exploitation In Media
Jump to new posts Re: Take Back My Image by BuffaloCO @ 12/15/14 11:26 PM

Right now this has pushed up a whole lot of mixed feelings in me. Gotta get back to T, but gotta get a real job first. It makes me angry that I know what I need and can't get there because people still judge and take me for granted. Sorry, had to
Survivors of Female Abuse
Jump to new posts Re: Disassociated memories... by RepressedMem @ 12/15/14 11:07 PM

I look at the fact that my physical self gets excited not due to some real attraction to her but definitely in my case it is survival instinct/compliance as it was made clear to me early on she would just as easily murdered me as use me as a sex obje
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Delusional or Disassociation fears by KMCINVA @ 12/15/14 09:28 PM

I will start to write or force myself to think of something positive or begin to recite affirmations (sometimes silently if in a somewhat public place) and other times I breath deeply. Over time as I have let go of the control of the memories and mo
Jump to new posts Re: Robert W. Service by victor-victim @ 12/15/14 09:21 PM

you are very welcome. it feels good to know i am not alone. together we share appreciation. i do like this one a lot. it never gets old. wish the same was true for me
Jump to new posts Re: mantra by victor-victim @ 12/15/14 09:17 PM

glad you guys like it. it means a lot to me.
Jump to new posts Re: an epithet for empty skies by victor-victim @ 12/15/14 09:07 PM

now that is venting. unfiltered. pure. raw. anger as an artform. i can't argue. i just hope you are feeling better. no man can live well in anger. i found it a very unhealthy lifestyle. all those years i harboured hatred, i only added inj
Jump to new posts Re: Diary of a Hollow Boy by victor-victim @ 12/15/14 08:30 PM

this is really good. especially enjoyed the third part. excellent.
Discussion Board Questions
Hello everybody, I just joined the website and have a couple of legal questions. I was sexually assaulted by a boss about 6 years ago, came down with PTSD as a result which literally ruined what I had worked my whole life to achieve. When this occurr
Discussion Board Questions
Jump to new posts Re: Who's in chat? by Sven @ 12/15/14 06:32 PM

Military Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: help for male rape in Army system by Chase Eric @ 12/15/14 06:21 PM

Could an option be to start with the confidence of a military chaplain? He/she may be more delicate with handling the information, and may provide a more sensitive and diplomatic way to phrase your concerns to military health officials.
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Delusional or Disassociation fears by iaccus @ 12/15/14 06:06 PM

Thank you kevin that is a great description of what i am experiencing, what are some of the things you use to distract you? It often happens at home with my family around me.
Military Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: help for male rape in Army system by newground @ 12/15/14 05:31 PM

hey bud I have spoken to some of the guys who were raped while on active duty. the mental health professionals in the military do have experience in that area as it happens unfortunately more than you might think. do be careful as you approach a car
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Love? by KMCINVA @ 12/15/14 05:17 PM

Wow I was just reading the post. I am amazed how much support those that responded here have given over the 12 years. You are to be commended. I did not realize MS had been around for so long. I am glad it has been. I read those words, I learned a
Military Survivors
Jump to new posts help for male rape in Army system by ninjasm @ 12/15/14 04:57 PM

I haven't yet disclosed to the Army Behavioral Health that I was raped by a man as an adult several years before joining the service. I need help - don't know where else to go - I really don't care what they think... but am afraid that they will eit
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Delusional or Disassociation fears by KMCINVA @ 12/15/14 04:38 PM

Iaccus Dissociation is quite disturbing. For me it became a way of life as the memories and past took over. I had a few episodes during therapy--the therapist could spot the signs, at home the signs were not noticed and many times I must have retrea
Family and Friends
Jump to new posts Re: Ah - the holidays.... by tbkkfile @ 12/15/14 03:52 PM

SB - You're not alone in dealing with this, both myself and my wife are going down to see my Mother tomorrow to take down the Christmas presents for my family who still live in the area, I just know she's going to say something Last time it was &quo
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Love? by Chase Eric @ 12/15/14 03:41 PM

Quote:Just please don't slam me for saying I loved my perp. I am having a hard enough time with that one already. Ron - you posted this twelve years ago, so your eyes may not see all the responses, but others will, and that perhaps adds some value to
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Landmines (41) Perpetually Healing by iamnotbubba @ 12/15/14 03:39 PM

Thank you so much for reading. iamnotbubba
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: first setback with my wife by KMCINVA @ 12/15/14 03:35 PM

glad you have come to a decision on how to move forward. Moving forward is the most important element in healing. Hopefully in time your wife comes around but she needs her time to absorb the situation. Good luck. Kevin
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