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Forum   Subject
Poetry
Jump to new posts its not easy by newground @ 11/21/14 10:01 PM

Itís not easy Öto be proud of who I am A thousand times a thousand voices tell me, I am not Not worthy, not loved, not useful, broken. They are lies of course, but how was a boy to know? He is handsome; heís a cutie, heís just a toy thatís all he is
Spirituality and Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Being Loved by God by Garf @ 11/21/14 09:56 PM

I pray that I may return the goodness of each of you at MS. I am overwhelmed to think that I am worthy to be a recipient of your encouragement, advice, and wisdom. I cannot believe that you would even talk to me or give me the time of day. You do
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: A benchmark...feels like headway by Garf @ 11/21/14 09:39 PM

It would be very difficult to accept that a parent would sexually abuse us. When I told my T about my CSA, I said my mother also did some form of it. The next week I said I was wrong, I took it back, that she did not really do it. What I think I r
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: A benchmark...feels like headway by Publius @ 11/21/14 08:08 PM

Children understand more than we give them credit for sometimes. You're not crazy. You're not remembering it wrong. If a child scrapes his/her knee and a parent cares for the wound the child thinks nothing of it. Kids know the difference. You
Spirituality and Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Being Loved by God by BuffaloCO @ 11/21/14 05:55 PM

You are not a freak. What you feel is like so much of what many of us feel or have felt. God loves you, and He knows what you went through. Remember it does not matter what the world says about you, only what God says about you, and He says a lot
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: A benchmark...feels like headway by learning2remember @ 11/21/14 05:22 PM

Traveler and Don64, I know you mean well and I hear it so thanks. Not sure I want to expect more progress, though. I feel fine where I am. Nor do I think I want more specifics. Just thought I should say that. Not sure why.
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Power of crosSwords by KMCINVA @ 11/21/14 04:53 PM

P Thank you. Your experiences are helpful to me. Your insights are helpful and being able to see your life in someone else words or experiences helps, at least it did for me, to put your life in perspective. It gave me hope. I have heard of PAS an
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: My first day of Sobriety by OxfordArms @ 11/21/14 03:35 PM

I know it's not the same, but when I quit smoking after 22 years I needed a lot of support. I was attending Celebrate Recovery meetings and using a video quit-smoking program through my work for encouragement. I also prayed a lot. Please reach out to
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Power of crosSwords by sorryson @ 11/21/14 07:36 AM

Kevin I appreciate your support. I am sorry you are living through this. My doctor had me attend a PAS (Parent Alienation Syndrome) support group for children of PAS. There were children from the mid twenties up to late 60's. Listening to them I sa
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Update and looking for advice by don64 @ 11/21/14 05:39 AM

Hi Matt, Welcome back, and I really support Magellan's suggestion to hang around and interact with the guys here. There is an enormous amount of experience here. For me, my biggest obstacles have always been related to my expectations. So, just j
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: I must be insane? by don64 @ 11/21/14 04:50 AM

Hi Magellan, I have been seriously mentally ill my entire life, but part of my illness has been a very mal-adaptive ability to hide in plain sight. What I am discovering as I heal the depths of the illness I have carried, is it has forced me to bec
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Stop the world I want to think by don64 @ 11/21/14 04:38 AM

Hi David, Sending you love and support. Don
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: My first day of Sobriety by don64 @ 11/21/14 04:33 AM

Hi David, Do you have any support with stopping drinking, other than yourself and MS? I tried to quit several times, but I needed the constant support of AA to actually do it. Knowing I could go to a meeting every day or more than once a day provi
Poetry
Jump to new posts Re: rule number one by kcinohio @ 11/21/14 12:16 AM

Nice one. Thank you.
Sexual Abuse/Exploitation In Media
Jump to new posts Re: Thoughts on how we were groomed by lapchinj @ 11/21/14 12:12 AM

Hey Cthulhu It's interesting that you mention that you knew being called a faggot was bad. Growing up in the '60s I thought that a faggot was a curse word or just plain name calling. I thought the definition of faggot was an anti war protester with
Poetry
Jump to new posts Re: Forgive? by victor-victim @ 11/20/14 11:55 PM

forgiving takes time. i would focus on surviving and recovery first. hate does not help healing. you have been infected with poison, and it must metabolize before you can even see straight. i was unable to contemplate forgiveness, and i cert
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: My first day of Sobriety by tbkkfile @ 11/20/14 11:45 PM

3 days in, I have to really concentrate on not going to the corner shop to buy some alcohol, I'm lying to myself about how it would help. The weekends approaching and no work to take up the day and my mind off of it, an evening meal when most folks
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Stop the world I want to think by tbkkfile @ 11/20/14 11:40 PM

Hi Publius Thanks for your post it's really appreciated. Being honest with ourselves is brutal, it has meant facing the reality of what I'd hidden behind these walls for a very long time, but in truth it was the only way that I could see to start h
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Stop the world I want to think by Publius @ 11/20/14 11:08 PM

Cities learn from their foes, not their friends, the lesson of building high walls. Unfortunately for us the same walls that seem to protect us when we're younger and understandably unable to deal with the abuse ourselves (most often because we have
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: I must be insane? by Magellan @ 11/20/14 09:28 PM

Thank you, Don. From all the feedback I repeatedly get from the world, I think that I scare most people just from my walk and my glance. I don't know how to put on a fake smile. When I do, it creeps people out.
Poetry
Jump to new posts Re: Forgive? by FormerTexan @ 11/20/14 09:05 PM

Quote:Forgive perhaps but he'll have to endure Some ugly truths he helped to create So I can move on before it's too late Well, I can sure relate to that. Getting some of the "stuff" off my plate over the years has been quite a process.
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Update and looking for advice by matt123 @ 11/20/14 08:42 PM

So, if i could be a little bit intrusive here, what have been your sexual experiences? / what is your current relationship status? Have you ever expressed this to a female partner?
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Update and looking for advice by Magellan @ 11/20/14 08:09 PM

Self acceptance is the HARDEST thing for any of us CSA survivors to achieve - gay or straight. I'm in a bit of a strange land regarding my sexuality as well. I came to accept my sexual attractions when I was 19. Got rid of the shame behind it. And
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Becoming sexually vulnerable by Mike26 @ 11/20/14 08:08 PM

Thanks for your responses, guys. This is so incredibly frustrating to me, because it just feels like its one more way in which my abuser has caused ongoing issues in my life. Sex is supposed to be fun, and it sucks that its become a huge issue. While
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Update and looking for advice by matt123 @ 11/20/14 07:10 PM

Its been about two and half years since my last post and things are getting much worse and I'm looking for some advice. http://www.malesurvivor.org/board/ubbthr...3680#Post403680 So, I'll start with an update In March this year something finally d
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