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Gay/Bi/Trans Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Sex and Love by vrocotamy @ 01/25/15 02:32 AM

Originally Posted By: ConfuzzedSome days I feel like I know myself very well. Other days I donít recognize myself at all. I donít act like the man who wants to be truly loved. I say I want a loving and honest friendship but I pervert my friendships a
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Anyone else with CSA survivor parents? by vrocotamy @ 01/25/15 02:16 AM

Hi, I wanted to know if anyone else here wanted to talk about having CSA survivor parents, and what that's meant for you in terms of disclosure, your recovery, etc. I'm a gay male ASA (I prefer the term date rape, in my case) survivor, and also eng
Male Survivors
I was triggered just the other day at my son's school band concert. The boys in the middle school band were so awkward, all elbows and ankles, and acne and tussled hair. I felt so protective of them, they seemed so vulnerable up there. This is happen
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Bad Night Upcoming Family Group Session by Bardo @ 01/25/15 02:04 AM

Sorryson, You have made so much progress just over the few months that I have known you, it is amazing. I feel your pain, not being able to share all of this with your Dad. I lost mine back in 2000, with so much left unresolved. But dealing with the
Poetry
Jump to new posts Re: mask - unmasked by bluesky @ 01/25/15 01:55 AM

So many masks we all have used, seldom do we remove it covers the pain, shame and scars that we hide, but strangely when I ask others if they see what I think is me. I get a reply beauty,strength,caring,loving,kind,giving,smart. It has taken me m
Books, Music & Films for Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Shame by Robert Karen by Still @ 01/25/15 01:54 AM

Landscape! NO PROBLEM brother! You found one whopper of an article about a very VERY key component of CSA and survival of it. No worries. Not everything we post of link-to has to be in-sync with our positions here. I know you would not buy into tha
Poetry
Jump to new posts OH storm wind by bluesky @ 01/25/15 01:54 AM

OH storm wind you are like the raging of a destructive fire. You burn down cities and fields of gold. But you are the elision of the dream. You are not real. My fear is real, My terror is close. But I hear my inner voice softly wailing. Saying to
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts What's Really Important!!!! by Still @ 01/25/15 01:47 AM

** Triggers ** If you want to see real, amplified and dramatic public outrage over treading upon the Football Gods, don't disclose them raping little boys by team leadership. Heck NO! Rather, accuse a team of fiddling with their ball pressure. BAL
Introductions
Jump to new posts Re: Hello All by DavoSwim @ 01/25/15 12:26 AM

Dave, Since we share the same first name, and we're the same age, I wanted to say hello. One thing that stood out when I read your intro is that despite the injustices heaped upon you, you have a desire to be a help to others. That is quite admira
Introductions
Jump to new posts Re: Not sure I even belong here, but regardless... by DavoSwim @ 01/25/15 12:21 AM

Personman, You made the right decision by coming here. You'll be safe here. The guys here will believe you, because we know what it's like to be in your situation. Please feel free to get it out and get it off your chest. You'll definitely feel b
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: "Just Do It" by motmcd @ 01/24/15 10:30 PM

Originally Posted By: honorablemanYou have confronted your abuser and are pure as the snow. You have said your truth and are free. Nothing else to do now but feel your freedom!!! H-man Thanks H-Man. This is my third attempt to hold my diocese to
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Bad Night Upcoming Family Group Session by sorryson @ 01/24/15 10:25 PM

Bob thank you. I give all credit to my sister who has supported us through this ordeal. My sister over 20 years ago faced the damage Mama and her family did to our family. She became an alcoholic but found recovery and counseling. She learned the d
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Tears from a forgotten boy..Trigger Warning! by unhappycamper @ 01/24/15 10:21 PM

Once I was triggered by the sight of a small boy with hearing aids. He was holding his mother's hand as they walked down the street, and I saw nothing to suggest he was being mistreated or unhappy. He just looked small and extremely vulnerable. It's
Books, Music & Films for Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Shame by Robert Karen by victor-victim @ 01/24/15 10:13 PM

hey no problem, landscape. nothing you said or did offended me.
Books, Music & Films for Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Shame by Robert Karen by Landscape @ 01/24/15 09:54 PM

I'm sorry that I did not include a trigger warning in my original post. That sentence is more than inappropriate, It's simply wrong. I shared the article, because on the whole, it made me think about my own feelings of shame. I am sincerely sorry th
Books, Music & Films for Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: A Code for Life by victor-victim @ 01/24/15 09:31 PM

it is my hope that this will be here for years to come to help future survivors long after i am gone. so take your time. it took me a lifetime to accumulate these gold nuggets. i have tried to condense volumes of information into chewable chunk
Books, Music & Films for Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Shame by Robert Karen by victor-victim @ 01/24/15 09:16 PM

i would be very worried. i tend to agree that such feelings would be cause for concern. i can't see how that sort of subtext could benefit the relationship, honestly. i mean, i actually recoiled when i read that statement you quoted. my rea
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: "Just Do It" by honorableman @ 01/24/15 09:10 PM

You have confronted your abuser and are pure as the snow. You have said your truth and are free. Nothing else to do now but feel your freedom!!! H-man
Men Abused/Assaulted as Adults
Jump to new posts Re: My Karma trying to understand **may Trigger** by honorableman @ 01/24/15 09:02 PM

Hey Bluesy, When it rains it pours. Nothing wrong with you. Same thing happened to me shortly after my assault by a guy. 5 more instances of guys trying to get in my pants either by directly asking me (no problem with this) or by kidnapping me. M
Spirituality and Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Past Firm Convicted Believer Now Doubting. by victor-victim @ 01/24/15 09:01 PM

wow. great story, serious dave. amen, brother. dear manipulated, if you are struggling with forgiveness, i would like to point you in the direction of Ken Singer: Evicting the Perpetrator http://www.malesurvivor.org/board/ubbthreads.php?ubb
Spirituality and Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Past Firm Convicted Believer Now Doubting. by Serious Dave @ 01/24/15 08:13 PM

Dear manipulated, I can tell that your pain is tearing you apart, and I am so sorry for what you have endured. You said, "Where is there any good, let alone abundant life in abuse?" By far, the toughest six words in scripture are "My
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: "Just Do It" by AlexBoyd @ 01/24/15 08:10 PM

You have a great wife!
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: "Just Do It" by motmcd @ 01/24/15 06:11 PM

Thanks everyone for your replies. I really appreciate your replies and feel the support you send my way with your words of support. It means so much to me. Nice!!!
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: a great post by iaccus @ 01/24/15 06:09 PM

Just FYI Sharky I see this post and I am glad I was able to contribute to it. Thank you!
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Therapist struggle and frustration by Serious Dave @ 01/24/15 05:03 PM

Your request to the T sounds very reasonable to me. Your writing is lucid and coherent, and everything you say just plain makes good sense. You don't sound like you need any more medication to me (maybe the T does). I know that meds are needed som
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